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In the western region of the “City of Brotherly Love” known as Philadelphia, my mother expelled me from her womb and indeed that is also where I spent my childhood, in my mother’s care. The majority of my time was spent in a recreational area containing such diversions as a jungle gym, swing set, sand box, etc. I was typically at the height of leisure while frequently at a temperature slightly below what might be considered standard room temperature. Outside of my educational institution I was engaging in a game of basketball with some of my peers, when two gentlemen who seemed to be of the disposition to cause a great deal of mischief began causing a great deal of chaos and disharmony in the area in which I lived. I was involved in one rather small bout of fisticuffs after which my mother became concerned for my general safety and well-being, and she informed me that I would be moving in with her sister and her sister’s husband in the previously mentioned community located at the previously mentioned location.
I implored my mother to relent approximately 24-48 hours ago, yet she gathered my belongings in a somewhat flat, rectangular shaped piece of luggage and expelled me from her presence. She placed her lips upon my cheek in an affectionate manner and handed me a pre-purchased pass for public transportation. I placed the headphones for my personal music system into my ears and verbalized the idea that I may as well impact this situation with my foot. Traveling in the highest available level of comfort, this is indeed an unfortunate situation (although I make this statement with some irony). Consuming the juices obtained by the squeezing of the fruit of a Citrus sinensis from a piece of glass stemware commonly reserved for the sipping of sparkling wine originating from the Champagne region of France, I pause to wonder if this is indeed how the residents of the admittedly upper-class neighborhood located at the previously mentioned location commonly live. Indeed, I find this situation may be rather to my enjoyment.
I puckered my lips and exhaled forcefully to produce a shrill note in order to gain the attention of a taxicab driver, and as the driver approached I observed his California vanity plate which, in place of the traditional jumble of alpha-numeric characters, used only the letters F, R, E, S, and H, spelling out the word “fresh”. Additionally, from his rear view mirror dangled a pair of oversized, fur-covered cubes decorated to look like the six-sided dice commonly used in gambling and board games. In such a situation I could have made a statement about the unusualness of this particular taxicab to the point of it being nearly unique. Instead I cogitatively decided against it and instead informed the driver that he should deliver me to what was to become my new home in the community located at the previously mentioned location.
We pulled up to a large domicile sometime between the hours of 7 and 8 o’clock a.m., and in a loud tone of voice I informed the cab driver that at some undetermined point in the future I would again detect his odour through my sense of olfaction. I gazed about the region of land that I was destined to rule, reflecting on my arrival: Here I would claim my rightful place upon the throne, from which I would govern the previously mentioned community of Bel-Air as monarch.
My life got flipped to 2D
And I'd like to take a minute
Just sit right there
I'll tell you about the ***land, straight from me.
In west Amherst born and raised
Maple Island I spent most of my days
Jumping out attacking relaxing all cool
Shooting some snails outside of school
When a couple of sins
Who were up to no good
Startin making KS'in in my neighborhood
I got in one little fight and my family tree got scared
They said 'Go get a job advancement.'
I begged mesos day after day
But she lost The Game
She gave NX and sent me on my way.
I put my walkman on and said, 'I might as well kick it, except I can't since I'm a beginner.'.
No class, yo this is bad
Drinking orange potion out of a champagne glass.
Is this what the people of Henesys Living like?
Hmmmmm this might be alright.
But wait I hear there're fur***s, KSers and that
Is this the type of place that they should send this noob?
I think so
I'll see when I get there
I hope they're prepared for the Noblesse of Henesys
Well, the plane landed and when I came out
There was a dude who looked like a GM standing there with my name out
I ain't trying to get ban yet
I just got here
I sprang with the quickness like the noob haste, disappeared
I whistled for a cab but it didn't come near
The license plate said "Beginners get 90% off" and it had dice in the mirror
If anything I can say that this cab was an NPC
But I thought 'Nah screw it' - 'Yo to Henny'
I pulled up to FM at 7 or 8
And I yelled to the cabbie 'MESOS PLZ?!?!?!?!'
I looked at my room
I was finally there
To sit on my *** as a Maple***
THIS BUILD IS AMAZING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!I LEFT MY GIRLFRIEND FOR THIS BUILD SHE SAID WHAT IS MORE IMPORTANT ME OR THE GAME AND I SAID THE GAME SO SHE LEFT ME BUT ITS OK BECAUSE I LOVE YOU INVADERJ AND I DEVOTED MY LIFE OF PLAYING LOL 24/7 NOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!YOUR SO COOL MAKE MORE BUILDS PLS PLS PLS PLS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! THIS BUILD HAD NOTHING WRONG WITH IT EXCEPT IT SHOWERED ME WITH VICTORY JUST LIKE THE TIME WHEN I ATE AT TACO BELL BUT I ATE THE SPICY RAP BURRITO SO I WENT INTO THE WOMEN'S RESTROOM BECASE THE MENS RESTROOM WAS CLOSED SO I PULLED DOWN MY SPONGEBOB UNDERWEAR AND POOPED BUT I THOUGHT I POOPED OUT HOT SAUCE BECAUSE MY ******** WAS BURNING ME AND WHILE I WAS POOPING I THOUGHT ABOUT THE IRELIA BUILD AND HOW MUCH IT WAS COOL SO I POOPED AND PEED AT THE SAME TIME AND WHEN I WAS DONE I WIPED MY ******** WITH MY DOLLAR BILL SO YEAH IM JUST SAYING WHEN I GOT OUT OF THE BATHROOM I SAW ALOT OF PEOPLE STARING AT ME SO I JUST LAUGHED OUT LOUD TO GET IT OUT OF MY SYSTEM SO AFTER I GOT HOME I ATE MORE BURRITOS AND POOPED SOME MORE THEN AFTER I GOT ON HERE TELLING MY STORY THANK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!