Trundle Humor Guide by Reptomincus
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This is my first guide on Mobafire, and I decided to tell everyone about Trundle and how he should and was intended by Riot to be played. Enjoy.
Now you're probably wondering why you pick Revive. Well, you pick revive because when you pick revive, every single member of Riot will come to your house with chicken legs and beat you senseless. You pick Clairvoyance because you want to know where your victims are at all times. You need to bite as many unsuspecting opponents as possible as many times as possible.
Alright, so you're playing Trundle. If you're actually trying to play Trundle, well you my good sir need to acquaint your facial features with a fundamental item used in building walls. Repeatedly. If you decide to troll with Trundle, which is what you should be doing, I recommend you follow this guide. I mean, he IS the troll king, isn't he?
Since Trundle is one kinky bastard, you want to take Chomp first. This will allow you to bite the enemy's *** as many times as you want. This is essential because you will annoy the living **** out of them. Once you are satisfied biting them repeatedly, you want to take a point in your worn out icy *****. Make sure to summon it right at the enemy's feet for maximum anal penetration. Unless it is a ***** like Ahri who will welcome it in her frontal female reproductive organ, but we aren't gonna go there today. Anyway, once you penetrate them, the already used ***** should be infected by your herpes virus. That's good, because once the enemy gets anal herpes, they will become more attracted to you so you can bite them more. By this time, you should be about 10-15 mins in the game, which leads us to what you should do mid game.
Now that the enemy has been bitten and infected with anal herpes, they are as kinky as you and want more from you. But what more can you give them? Oh, that's right! Trundle can **** all over the field. You need to take a point in your W now. This step is very important. As soon as you summon your ***** now, you want to make it **** all over the enemy that has been penetrated and the surrounding enemies. This will ensure they get mad and try to kill you. Unless they're a ***** like Ahri, who will enjoy it, but once again, we will not go there today. Now that the enemies are covered in your ****, what more can you do? Oh, that's right, keep ****ing them anal.
Now is when the anal herpes you infected the enemy with will play a huge part in your team's success. Around the 30-40 minute mark, the anal herpes you infected the enemies with will become the infamous SAH (Super Anal Herpes). This disease is awful. The enemies will vomit out their *** and **** ****. They will feel a strong urge to give baron oral sex. They will want the Ancient Golem (blue buff) to grind on them. If they are a ***** like Ahri, they will want you to come someplace private so she can **** you. She will want your *****, a full package of ****, and of course, your bite. Once SAH has gotten to its most powerful form, you want to drain the victim's life force so you can send their soul to Sandusky's Daycare where it soul will be raped constantly. By old men. In bikinis.
If you read this whole article, get a life. I'm kidding. You know what I'm not kidding about though? The holocaust. And actually trying with Trundle. I mean, seriously, he's Trundle, The ****TROLL KING****. Riot is just asking you to troll with him. Anyway, thanks for reading and if you play Trundle and actually try, uninstall. Now.