Murder at Vayne Manor

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October 2, 2012 3:23pm

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Quote | PM | +Rep by MissMaw » October 2, 2012 3:23pm | Report

Champion and Skin Sale; Murder at Vayne Manor

Posted by Vayne on Mon, 2012-10-01 16:08

Ladies. Gentlemen. Damnable fools. Not a soul leaves stately Vayne Manor until I reveal the uncouth ruffian amongst us who dares to ruin my night.

There has been a murder.

Here’s what I know: one casualty, third floor parlor. Our victim – a very wealthy benefactor of the Veteran Summoners Foundation, poised to donate a hefty sum. And one of you killed him. My maid Nidalee is, at this very moment, cleaning up the mess so that no further party-goers are alarmed. You champions are dangerously close to being debased and forever uninvited from these privileged events. Shall we peel back the shadows and ascertain our culprit?

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As a Noxian assassin, you’d imagine Katarina would be our prime suspect. She insists that she’s only here to chat with the upper crust, and I haven’t seen her leave the foyer near the concert hall. 487 RP.

After inspecting the body, there was no evidence of void energy or caustic spittle, ruling out Kog’Maw as a suspect. We must remove him from the buffet, however. 487 RP.

Puncture wounds perforate the body, but Graves’ shotgun, Destiny, doesn’t make holes like these. You’d notice powder burns on the tattered cloth and scorches on the skin. Outlaw, maybe, but I trust him within these walls. 487 RP.

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Sabretusk Sejuani is relegated to the downstairs parlors for I won’t have that boar tracking mud on my new carpet. Perhaps she could get a smaller breed of pig to hold while at my events? 487 RP.

The body was discovered on the third floor, an off-limits area for children like Demolisher Nunu. Willump, however, cleaned out the liquor cabinets. 487 RP.

Abyssal Nautilus spent most of the party staring into my impressive tank of saltwater fish and searching for the bathroom. There are 73 bathrooms in this manor; how he could not find one escapes me. 487 RP.

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These champions and skins shall stay off the hook and on sale from October 2 to October 5. I will not rest until the killer lies riddled with silver bolts. But if none of these champions is the real killer, then…

…who is?

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Quote | PM | +Rep by devdevil » October 2, 2012 4:40pm | Report

Twas karthus who killed em, with his global ult xD

If you hear a voice within you say 'you cannot paint,' then by all means paint, and that voice will be silenced. ~Vincent Van Gogh

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Quote | PM | +Rep by Berzerk » October 2, 2012 4:53pm | Report

It was the MAID. SELL US THE MAID!!!

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Quote | PM | +Rep by Toshabi » October 2, 2012 7:55pm | Report

Riot, why are you so corny?

jhoijhoi wrote:

Also, I think the levels of immorality in this thread are astounding. You'd really throw a child off a boat for your own luggage? Wow.

MrCuddowls wrote:

Hahahaha telling me my items are bad HHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAhA
Listen buddy don't judge someone's items if your only level 13
This build is Platinum approved, Thats all you need to know

IceCreamy wrote:

(1:07): I prefer your balls over ***hol

caucheka wrote:

lux kept hiding in the bushes and casting spells on us, harassing us pretty good but i had heal so no worries. alistar.. just did his thing i guess. he was a noob.
(random note but i did say "lux what are you doing in the bushes? you are not garen get out of there, you look silly.")