Ok, every time I walk into a ranked game and see a bad tank, I die a little inside. So, here is me, sharing my knowledge with you.

Disclaimer: Some swearing.

First off, what is tanking?

To understand tanking, you have to understand LoL. In LoL, everyone deals damage, but not everyone does at the same rate. To tank is a playstyle that sacrifices damage for survivability. Here are a few important facts to remember about tanking.

1) Tanking is all about being the last person standing. You deal **** damage, but in the end, when you're the last one standing, does that really matter? They laughed when you built a Force of nature first, but you'll be the one laughing when you kick their ***es. So, build tanking items, aspiring tank, you!

2) You also need to deal damage. I'm not talking about 50 dps. If that's all you do, you might as well be a fricking wave of minions, and well, we all know how much a wave of minions do. I mean, Significant damage. You need to deal enough damage so at the end of the day, after all the armor, magic resist, and heal bull **** you deal some actual damage. Tanking does not give you an excuse to deal no damage. When it's down to just you and him, if you don't want to be the one on the ground at the end of the day, you better be bringing some mad dps.

Edit: about trinity


and ffs, realize that...

3) No, you're not gonna be the main source of damage on your team. Jesus, whenever an amumu builds a deathcap first, a rabbit dies. Stop killing rabbits.

Look at the cute rabbits!

Why you kill them?

There is a reason why people focus on building damage, or everyone would play tanky dps. So if you understand...

4) ****ing protect your carries! No, I don't mean, jump in when your carry does something stupid like initiate with their escape spell. I mean, when the **** hits the fan, you better be right next to your carry, unless you're initiating. If you're initiating, you can jerk off wherever you want, but unless you are, I expect you to be CLOSE ENOUGH TO HUMP YOUR CARRY. If you aren't close enough to rape your carry, you aren't close enough.
pics credit where they belong.

So, I read these threads alot: "What do you do when an Olaf with ult comes at your carry with ghost?"

5) Here's what you do. Don't waste your cc on him, save it for when it'll actually affect him. You keep up with your carry, and when that Olaf's ult comes off, You lay the mutha****ing smackdown on that dumbass. He think he so cool with his ragnorak? Well, we'll see how much he likes his epeen when your ****ing CHOP IT OFF! This is known as peeling, a.k.a. being smart.

And finally....

6) Tanks, at the end of the day, no amount of tankiness will save you from a farmed up carry. I could talk about diminishing returns on armor, MR, and hp. I could talk about carry kiting and initiation position. But in the end, the real reason I build damage is because I WANT TO PUNCH THAT SISSY CARRY IN THE FACE.

Only one damage item, mind you, only one. But when push comes to shove and the world attacks, punch back.

8) Finally, we have initiation. What is initiation? It's when you, as a tank, say **** this. "**** CARRIES. **** KITING. **** YOUR OP SCALING AND CHAMPIONS, AND SKILLS. WE FIGHT ON MY TERMS. THIS IS MY WORLD! MY WORLD!"

Initiation is the most powerful move that a tank has.

It is the nuking of Hiroshima (sry, about that, japs). It is the D-Day of tanking.

When a tank is farmed, tanky, and powerful, he pulls out the biggest CC stick he has, flashes straight to the enemy carry and starts whacking on him like there's no tomorrow. You might die. You might do nothing, stunlocked till death. BUT YOU WENT OUT LIKE A MAN.

Peace, I'm out, happy tanking!

Tl;dr, build tanky, build damage, protect your carries, initiate if fed like hell.