Choose your lane
The first step to swagging on noobs is to choose your prefered lane.
I recommend you look at yourself in the mirror while thinking "today i will swag on someone". That will help you stay determined and decisive. After you've done that you can turn on your CPU, open up LoL and pick a mechanically difficult champion to outskill and out****ing**** your lane opponent.
I recommend someone like Sion, Warwick, or Master Yi in the middle lane (best lane).
Itemization is half the gameplay believe it or not.
Luckily for you itemization isn't the hardest thing to understand! You just have to get into the right mindset. There are 3 simple things you should always focus on:
1. How much damage do i need? (obviously everything you can get)
2. How tanky is my opponent? (if you can't kill him in at least 3sec you do not have enough damage)
3. Please do not be a ***** and just build damage for gods sake.
You should always keep in mind that the most important factors are clearly defined in League of Leggins. If you're new to the game yourself it may not seem very logical but worry not. It comes with experience. Here's my list which i strongly recommend you to remember before you begin to swag on people.
1. Burst is the most important thing in the game. With burst it's easier to get kills and surprise both your friend and foe.
2. Movement speed is the 2nd most important stat in the game after AP/AD depending on with champion you are playing.
On a side note the lists are completely irrelevant if you're playing with the fabled wet noodle build. (Tank + Frozen mallet)
The Majority of "high elo" players would tell you that your teamfighting depends on the champ you are playing. That just isn't true at all.
I promised to teach you how to swag **** op fra slap and i'm a man of my word. The trick to teamfighting is actually very simple. Just be better than the enemy team. Don't trust your teammates - they are a bunch of boosted monkeys anyways.
Wait for your team to do some damage and soak up the damage and CC. When you feel like the time is right, you can jump in and swag on noobs (your teammates included).
Master Yi > League of Legends
I hope this guide helped you become a better player, but more importantly a better person :)