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Yet you offer phantom dancer as an alternate item. I understand your idea of wanting the movement speed for chasing, movement speed is incredibly important on talon. Which brings me to the next point.
"Here's where I see a lot of bad advice out there. It's typical for players nowadays to just insta grab Trinity Force on any not straight AD carry. This item is massively useless for Talon. As is Sheen. Tri force gives you these positives, a little bit of damage and health, but the mana is unecessary, the attack speed is a waste, and the sheen proc is not as good as it may seem."
Right before you say this you talk about 1200 crits w/ infin edge, when you combine it w/ sheen proc and blood thirster you end up w/ 2.1k crits. Enough said about how sheen proc isn't useful. Furthermore, you make no mention of the additional movement speed TF gives you, which is the whole reason you list phantom as viable, or of the snare which helps trigger ur passive. Not that frozen mallet isnt viable, but if u have TF it becomes a not must, between TF snare proc and ur W you can keep passive trigger quite easily and have all the chasing power u need.
Final points. Lifestealing is still definitely useful on this champ, you'll come off many gank wins low on life, and w/ lifesteal and a quick jungle creature or creep mob u can restore most of ur HP via thirster. Also Black cleaver as a viable item? It's not an attack speed champ as you pointed out, making the fact that cleaver's armor pen is through stacked attacks nearly useless. 55 dmg is nice, but atk speed is unncessary and therefore would be better spent on TF/last whisper. Atk Speed Seals on a champ where you yourself say atk speed is useless is again a contradiction.
I really do think alot of your build is definitely viable, but you might need to re-think a few things. I'll be thumbs down due to these contradictions.
Other than that I really like this. I haven't dominated this well since playing Kat and Leblanc between level 10-19.