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prime

Humor Guide by MildlyMalicious

Not Updated For Current Season

This guide has not yet been updated for the current season. Please keep this in mind while reading. You can see the most recently updated guides on the browse guides page.


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League of Legends Build Guide Author MildlyMalicious

Holy Flying Tiamats Batman! (Troll Guide)

MildlyMalicious Last updated on October 13, 2012
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Team 1

[VS]

Team 2

Ability Sequence

1
5
9
14
15
Ability Key Q
2
4
8
10
13
Ability Key W
3
7
12
17
18
Ability Key E
6
11
16
Ability Key R





Not Updated For Current Season

The masteries shown here are not yet updated for the current season, the guide author needs to set up the new masteries. As such, they will be different than the masteries you see in-game.



Masteries

 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
3/
Sunder
Archmage
 
 
 
 
 
 
1/
Executioner
 
 

Offense: 30

 
 
 
 
 
Durability
Vigor
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
Honor Guard
Mercenary
 
 
 
 
 
 
Juggernaut
 
 

Defense: 0

 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
Strength of Spirit
Intelligence
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
Mastermind
 

Utility: 0


Guide Top

Before you downvote...

This guide was made for fun based of random games me and my friends played. I'm not saying this guide is beneficial in any way but I have legibly won some games with this silly build. Maybe try for teh lulz? Or don't. Have fun!!


Guide Top

TEH REVOLUTION HAS BEGUNNNZ!!

Thanks to you guy's undying support this SUPER IMPURTANTZ guide to humanity has peaked at the top rated fresh guide in the "humor" (aka THE STUFF RIOT IS HIDING FROM YOU)!!!!!!! Keep up the good work, tell all your friends, bosses, homeless men you pass on the street, errrrybody needs to know about this! I'm counting on you, as a messenger of teh truth.
Also, if you do like i tell you and suceed, obviously, either pm me or leave a comment with a screenshot of the game. More proof = More people who shall believe!

All my <3's,


MM
(super secret codename given by TOP MEN)


Guide Top

MOAR TIAMATS!!!

HAYYYYYY YOUUUU GAAAAIZZEEEEEE!!!! :DDDDDD

This is the most awesomest build ever! I mean come on, Tiamat is obviously teh most underrated item in teh whole game since nobody uses it. That's Riot's way of tricking all of you and it worked!!!....UNTIL NAO!

Introducing.....

TEH TIAMAT
The most OP item in the whole game! It's non-unique passive obviously makes it teh best item to stack. When I say stack, i mean 5 STACKED TIAMATS BRAH!!! There's no other way to stack them. If you stop at 4, YOU'RE DOING IT WRONG!!!


Guide Top

Prejudice of teh Tiamat

Y U HATE TIAMAT?

Honestly, all I ever hear about Tiamat is how its so useless.
You know what?!...
YOU'RE WRONG.
WRONG WRONG WRONG WRONG WRONG
The passive eventually makes your autoattacks do 200% damage!!
What's not op about that?
Nothing.
That's what.


Guide Top

WHY TEH TIAMAT IS GAMEBREAKING OPPPPP

Let's take a look at the stats of our new best frand, teh Tiamat!!!!!

1. 50 Attack damage
OOOOOOOMG that's more than teh B. F. Sword so it's gotta be op obviously.

2. 15 health regen
You might as well gain health while being op!!! And remember, 5 x 15 is 75!!!

3. 5 mana regen
Cause you do have to use spells every once in a while. Why not?

4. 50% cleave(35% ranged)
TEH BREAD AND BUTTAH!!!! The whole reason you stack Tiamats is for this!!!!

That's four stats!!!! The simple fact that there are more stats on it that hardly any other item makes it the best item in the game, ESPECIALLY since its passive is NOT unique. OPPPPPPPPPPP


Guide Top

SUMMONAR SPELLZ?!

In order to make teh op, reeeeealy op, you need teh perfect summoner spells. There are only two that are perfect:
and
Why these you ask?
Simple. CAUSE I'M RIGHT
If you ever are focused, which if you're doing it right you better be or they will die in 2 seconds, you better be able to get right back up and get in teh fight! What's better for that than Revive?! Nothing, that's what. It lets you get back up AND run ****tons faster to get right back in teh fight. OP i know, right?
How do you attack more things at a faster rate? You could always get a Recurve Bow but then you lose a Tiamat slot and THAT'S STUPID. Instead, grab Surge. It provides stupid attack speed and AP(cause you use spells right?) This way, you hit things faster and therefore, win easier.


Optional Summoner Spells

NONE

That's right, none. If you pick any other summoner spells, you will fail and/or get trolled into oblivion and/or have to uninstall out of pure shame. If I find out that you used a different summoner spell, i'll steal your summoner name, run you into the jungle for 30 straight games, and let you die to wraiths. Most embarrassing death, evar. Don't test me >:(


Guide Top

How to farm Version 1.0.0.34

1. Aim in teh middle
2. Autoattack
3. 3 shot all minions.
4. You will have over 9000 cs by 20 minutes in
5. Proceed to win all games.


Guide Top

Stages of teh Game!

EARLYGAME

Step 1. Rush two Tiamats
Step 2. Get boots to attack faster.
Step 3. Win your lane easily.



MIDGAME

Step 1. Make sure you have 4 Tiamats by now
Step 2. Find teamfight
Step 3. Attack center-most person
Step 4. Win easily



LATEGAME

Step 1. Repeat Midgame strategy with all 5 Tiamats
Step 2. Profit


Guide Top

Teamfights!!!

By mid game, you should have at least 3 Tiamats and wrecking anyone and everyone that opposes you, so you're next question should be, "HOW I WIN TEH TEAMFIGHT BRAH?!?!"
Answer: Autoattack the center-most champion and/or minion. Proceed to win the team fight. Go buy moar Tiamats.
If you do it any other way, you will lose and get ignored/reported/banned for you're epic failure and disgrace of teh Tiamat
Simple enough. No further Questions.


Guide Top

WHO SHOULD I BUY TIAMATS ON?!

Answer: Any
Complicated Answer: Any champion that has an autoattack. Therefore, by those standards, that would mean all champs.
Really Complicated Answer: Think of a situation where the champ you were playing was in a team fight and your Amumu locks everyone in place right next to each other. Would of loved 5 Tiamats then huh? Exactly.
Strange, yet simple answer: Y U NO TEEMO?


Guide Top

Proof!!!!!

User submitted and exactly my point. If you didn't believe before, now, you have proof that Tiamat Teemo is too stronk.


Guide Top

THINGS TO ADD TO MAKE PURTY

1. Proof of teh Awesome
2. Purty Colors?
3. Maybe moar proof?
4. Teemo + 5 Tiamats = ???
5. ???
6. Profit


Guide Top

TEH CONCLUSION

I could go on and on about how the Tiamat is the best item in the entire game. I could also go on about how i'm secretly obsessed with this item (>.>). I could, but I won't. Instead, i'll leave you with what this whole guide is about. Thanks for reading! ^ ^
Tiamat = WIN

Don't question meh brah..


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