Humor Guide by Ruin Sage
Not Updated For Current Season
This guide has not yet been updated for the current season. Please keep this in mind while reading. You can see the most recently updated guides on the browse guides page.
Not Updated For Current Season
The masteries shown here are not yet updated for the current season, the guide author needs to set up the new masteries. As such, they will be different than the masteries you see in-game.
Do you have the balls to go all out and rape your opponents in the face? How about the nuts to take the most gutsy build of all time and annihilate the enemy? Do you have the stones to keep to your proven path, even in the face of defeat? How about the testes to take that defeatist attitude and shove it up the enemy's ***?
If you answered 'No ****! These mah balls, LOOK AT THEM!' then I have the game for you.
Introducing- COURAGE MODE!-SHOW THOSE ******* WHO HAS THE BALLS.
So what is COURAGE MODE?
COURAGE MODE is your way of proving one thing and one thing only- YOU are the man with the biggest nuts around.
You take the build that takes the most balls to use, and you own that *****. I'm talking- Every Stacker ( ), Boots of Swiftness, Trinity Force and your role's Crowning Item ( ).
You play to win and you win by killing EVERYTHING!!
As soon as the game starts, you let everyone know who has the balls by saying-
/all COURAGE MODE ACTIVATED!
That way, all 10 people will know you are a puss when you back down and buy something else.
Don't forget- once you are full build SHOUT IT TO THE WORLD!!
/all MAXIMUM COURAGE LEVEL!!
But I can't forget- when you are crushing the enemy under the weight of your giant balls,
TAUNT LIKE A BOSS.
/all CANT HANDLE THESE HUGE BALLS!
/all CRUSHED BY MY MASSIVE STONES!
/all FEAR MY BALLS OF STEEL!!
Toons with balls.
As soon as you get into champion select, you push random and lock in- LIKE A REAL MAN.
But, being your first time trying to show off your huge stones, the best champions for it are in 2 tiers.
1=Good. They have both AP and AD conversion ratios and can use all the items to the fullest. These guys take less balls than the others to use, but you don't have control over who you pick- if you are a real man!
Akali, Blitscrank, Corki, Ezreal, Irelia, Jarvan IV, Kayle, Kog'Maw, Miss Fortune, Nidalee, Orianna, Pantheon, Poppy, Shaco, Skarner, Teemo, Tristana, Twisted Fate, Twitch, Udyr, Warwick, and Wukong.
2=Bad. Good luck! These guys take the biggest balls of all!
I don't even know why I gave you a list. You are going to Random like a real man, right?!
The items for those with balls.
What items have the most balls? THESE!
It doesn't matter what order you get your stackers, but you WILL buy them before anything else. Slightly more ***** is getting your Boots of Swiftness after your first one, but you won't- YOU HAVE THE BALLS.
Follow that up with the most badass item of all time- Trinity Force!
Now comes your only choice in the game. The Bloodthirster, Rabadon's Deathcap or Warmog's Armor? If you get Warmog's Armor and you are not the tank- you have ZERO BALLS. If you get the wrong item for your role, you are not gaining more balls- you are just stupid! FAILURE!
As the person with the biggest balls around, you go for kills. Thus, you will only take Flash and Ignite, NUT UP AND FACE THE PAIN!
This means that your Jungler, (in my case, Irelia) has to have even BIGGER BALLS. NO SMITE FOR YOU! NO CLAIRVOYANCE FOR YOUR SUPPORT!
Masteries and Runes
Even with huge balls, you do need to be functional.
So you can go with what you need. I suppose.
Team full of balls?
Get your friends together and have a manpetition (man competition, duh)! Find out which of your friends can beat your balls.
CRUSH THE ENEMY UNDER THE WEIGHT OF YOUR GIANT STONES.
When proving who has the biggest balls, screw your team. ALL KILLS FOR YOU, BIG BALLER! Just remember- your team is trying to take them from you! 0.o