lol, that ^ Anyways....

This is my first Mobafire Guide, so I hope everyone finds it informational and beneficial to their game! I have added a TON of things and put in a lot of work, so I greatly appreciate upvotes AND downvotes along with comments, questions, and ways to improve.

I have always used Mobafire to get a head start on any new champ I purchase, and I hope that this guide will help all my fellow Teemo fanatics get a raping head start in 3's over anyone who thinks they can use the jungle to escape...

Pros:

Mushroom damage is insane
With the removal of wards in 3's, you will have the only map control
Poison allows for guerrilla tactics
Alot of bulk from health items while maintaining an increase to AP

Cons:

"Global Passive" forces you to be map aware
Shortest range of all ranged toons
Oracles and the lanterns can be kinda annoying. Just kill them for buying them.
Enemy team CAN see you while on the alter! Even when invisible. This is the most important thing to remember while in 3's.


So, as you can see there are better pros than cons, and the cons all have to do with correct positioning, and that can only be learned from dying. ALOT.

I ranked up Teemo's abilities due to the sustained damage you will see coming from Toxic Shot. After toxic shot, you want to get as much burst out of Blinding Dart as possible. Move Quick is the utility of Teemo, and just one rank will cause you to move faster than most other champs when chasing and fleeing.

*SPECIAL NOTE*
The selection of Toxic Shot over Blinding Dart is not set into stone. This is a 3's guide, and as such you should coordinate with your team on which would be smarter for opening game. Toxic shot will give you that damage you need if you or the enemy team invade your relic, HOWEVER a well timed blinding dart at level one will almost always result in a kill with no team casualties if the enemy team is full of auto attack champions, or one with a lot of early game auto attack damage. Figure out what comes first at levels one and two, and follow the guide from there.

I have the masteries set as 22/0/8 in order to give you the best early game damage output with the movement speed (provided by Swiftness ) needed to forgo Boots until after the Rod of Ages is completed. Not much to discuss here. A smart game play will allow you to avoid picking up the health mastery Veteran's Scars .

As a side note, Improved Recall can be swapped out for Summoner's Insight if you feel you need the 15 sec CD reduction to flash. I enjoy the fast recall and rarely use flash outside of "oh sh!t" situations, but its a preference mastery, so do what you feel.

A powerful early game will throw you into a overwhelming mid and late game. You start off with 8.55 magic pen and 31 ability power. That is a TON when Teemo's AP ratios are at an all time high. Just auto attack something, and watch your Toxic Shot poison melt them away!

Yeah, that was a revolver reference. You you didn't get it, then stop reading now and go watch your my little ponies... >.>

So here is a break down of buy order and what builds into what and when.

1. You start with Kage's Lucky Pick. Don't sell this ever. It will build into your last item and the gold boost you will have from keeping it the entire game WILL pay off. You will have 60 gold left over. Buy a health pot if you want it. 5 empty slots.


2. Now build your Catalyst the Protector. I usually don't have to recall until I can afford the whole item, but if you have to go back sooner than that, it usually means you need more health, so buy the Ruby Crystal over the Sapphire Crystal. 4 empty slots.


3. After that, pick up your Blasting Wand. 3 empty slots.


4. Finally, after much farming and fighting and killing and dying, you can combine your Catalyst the Protector and your Blasting Wand into your Rod of Ages. 4 empty slots.


5. Time for the legendary Boots. Upgrade into Ionian Boots of Lucidity when you have the gold. 3 empty slots.


6. Its time to begin building your Nashor's Tooth. Start with your Fiendish Codex over Stinger as you want the AP more than the attack speed at this current time. If you have to buy something, buy Amplifying Tome over Meki Pendant. After the Codex you have 2 empty slots. After Stinger you have 1 empty slot. After combining them into Nashor's you have 2 empty slots.


7. Buy your Blasting Wand and Giant's Belt. As you only have 2 empty slots, these are the more efficient items to fill them with. 0 empty slots until you combine them into Rylai's Crystal Scepter, when you will have 1 empty slot.


8. Fill that one empty slot with Needlessly Large Rod into Wooglet's Witchcap. You officially have 0 empty slots.


9. Time to finish you last item buy turning that Kage's Lucky Pick into Blackfire Torch. Build is now complete. 0 empty slots. WHY AREN'T YOU ON DUTY YET??



Now, once you are done with all of your build, don't forget about Ichor of Illumination and Ichor of Rage. Nice boost to AP, AD, ATK SPD, (the CD reduction is useless) and turret damage.

So lets say you're playing a really tough team, and no matter what you do, you keep dying. What do you do? Here are some items that you can swap in whenever that should relieve some of that pressure...

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Enemy team has alot of AP burst

Abyssal Mask is viable as it gives you the AP and Magic Pen while providing you with a little more survivability to get past an AP's nuke phase.
Wit's End is not my first choice at all, but it provides the magic resist you need while still giving you an increase to damage from it's on-hit effect and attack speed to get Toxic Shot out faster.

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Enemy team has a mean AD carry

Well, for starters, that's where Blinding Dart comes in. BUT, if that's not enough, these items may see you through...
Zhonya's Hourglass... yeah... definitely not my favorite item, but it will do in a pinch, even against AP (if you can somehow time it right). Increase to armor with a nice AP boost, this item is ALL up to you.
Warden's Mail or Randuin's Omen is viable as the slow effect will keep them off you long enough to Move Quick away.

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Need Tenacity?

Then Moonflair Spellblade is a cheap way to get it while keep the CD boots and a boost to AP.

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As you can tell, you want as much AP as possible with this play style. Keep looking for ability power while still countering the enemy team if you need it. Hopefully the health boost from Rod of Ages and Rylai's Crystal Scepter will allow you from building any more survivability, but by all means, build what the game calls for. And good luck!

After the first few comments were made, I decided that this needed to be addressed. Thank you ovnoglavi for the question. I answered in the comments, but here is why I chose to rush a Rod of Ages:

With the increased start to gold, Kage's Lucky Pick is purchasable at the start with 60 gold to spare (so buy a Health Potion if you feel you need one), giving a sold gold boost over your opponents and the AP he needs to hit hard at level 1. The Rod of Ages is to increase his bulk. A Blitzcrank Rocket Grab into an Olaf or bursty AP mage will take Teemo out in an instant. By having the increase in health while still providing AP, I find Teemo is much more viable in team fights, and can survive the focus the enemy team may place upon you. Low health in 3's results in a fast death.

I wait that long on Boots because of his passive Move Quick and the Swiftness mastery. That usually boosts you in the movement speed range of tier one boots with out having to buy them. Now, if you need boots, by all means, please buy them! However, your survivability will decrease forcing you to rely on precise positioning to avoid feeding rather than survivability.

Here is a photo with Move Quick and Swiftness without Boots:
As you can see, his starting movement is 311. With one rank in Move Quick, it becomes 342. Now, activate the ability to hit 373 movement.
Now, Boots give you 50 movement. That means a champ without boots will have 300 to 330 movement. Therefore, Teemo is faster than all champions without boots. A champ with boots will be between 350 and 380. This puts you VERY close to any champion with boots and even faster than many when Move Quick is activated.

Hopefully this section is clear on the "no boots at start" issue, lol. :P

So, you have your runes and masteries all good to go, have Ignite in your back pocket, and the sexy Kage's Lucky Pick giving you that amazing gold boost... What now? Well, you now have around 64 AP in the start and so your Blinding Dart will hit for around 131 damage (before enemy magic resist reduces that a bit) and one auto attack with Toxic Shot will net you about 84 magic damage and 48 physical damage (that's if you attack ONCE and run, again not including enemy armor and magic resist reducing it a bit). Open a fight with Ignite on the hardest to kill enemy or the one will the most healing and to trigger Summoner's Wrath boost that starting AP to 69!

Okay, all good to go? Captain Teemo is on duty, so run over to that small bush between your Relic and the speed boost platform in the middle of the jungle. Only you, because your Camouflage passive will trigger, and if the enemy team invades, you act as an invisible ward for your team and can get a nice ambush should they move out and your team gets the flank advantage. As seen here:

(To the left is your alter, to the right is the speed boost platform)

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Here I just got a kill on an Ahri that invaded and then managed to ward while a Garen and Fiora stood on top of me unknowing. In the end, I got another kill and two assists before they managed to kill us a second time. We started the game with both Relics and 4 to 2.

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Now, a warning! If they have a character like Dr. Mundo, Olaf, Blitzcrank (anyone will a skill shot) either stand outside the bush somewhere, to the back of the bush as far as you can, or just don't stand in that damn bush. You CAN and WILL be harassed until you die if the enemy team catches on that you are watching them... >.> ....

Hopefully you and your team get your relic, and maybe even theirs. Just remember that the enemy team CAN see you while on the relic platform! Now, head to which ever lane you best support your team. By going bottom, you can harass the hell out of them and you and your lane mate can farm to your heart's delight. If you go top, you will focus on leveling as soon as possible and reaching level 6 to get your ult. Watch your map, call mia's that last over 1.5 seconds, and play smart. You pack a punch, so use that to your advantage. Make them fear the Teemo. FEAR HIM!!!!

Hit level 6 yet? About time! Now, start warding with Noxious Trap. Hit key areas like: the speed boost platform and the bushes adjacent to it, the entrances and exits to the relic (placing too close will allow them to see the shroom), entrances to the jungle, common escape routes in jungle near the first wild creep and the entrance/exit of the enemy base. etc etc. The list goes on. Watch where the enemy team commonly flees to, and start warding over there... And over there.... and over there..... and TEEMO GETS A KILL!!! BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!

When late game hits, hopefully you are more fed than the enemy team. Just position yourself well, blind dart often but efficiently, and don't be afraid to hit someone a few times then speed boost away. A shroom and one or two auto attacks is often enough to kill any AP character they may have. Divide and conquer them. Play smart, and what ever you do, do NOT let them ACE your team. Even if it means letting your teammate die or you having to die to allow your friend to escape. Just remember that you pack a punch, so don't leave your teammate to die when you could have bursted the enemy team down and gotten a double kill.


On a side note, at level one if you manage to capture both alters you get 71 AP as seen here:

I would love to have people take screen shots of their games using this guide and let me know how it was. Here are a few with tagged credits:


This victory was my own. I played with a Garen and Kha'Zix against an Ahri, Fiora, and Garen.

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Very next game I played with a Katarina and Darius against a Vladimir, Shen, and Malphite. Our Darius disconnected halfway through the game (before even a single turret was lost) and we still came back due to Teemo's amazing burst and tankiness.

I did a test with spell vamp. It works with Blinding Dart for 100% of your spell vamp. It works with your shrooms ( Noxious Trap), but your shroom is considered AoE, so spell vamp is reduced to a third. So 20% spell vamp is only 6% when it comes to your shroom. If you want to build spell vamp, go for it, but I personally believe that the bulk is needed more than the spell vamp in three's.

Thank you for reading! I know it doesn't have fancy pictures, links, moseovers, videos, music, cotton candy, clowns, skittles, a monkey dancing in a top hat, a woman without a.....

Sorry, got a bit lost there. But as the days turn to weeks, and I learn how to clean this up with some visuals, I will surely do so. If anyone cares to help me out, let me know. My summoner name is "Easy Points" and I play in North America. hmu. I'm certainly not the best, but I play a mean support, Teemo, and Darius. Thanks again, and please leave comments and upranks!

See you later Inferior Beings!

PS, if you made it this far, I will tell you what Teemo's Global Passive is... Anyone that sees a Teemo, will be taunted and will attack said Teemo. Think about this, and use it to your advantage.

Future Plans:

[*] Find a fun picture of Teemo
[*] Create a warding map of the new three's
[*] Create a map of common enemy travel and flee paths
[*] Create a video
[*] Take a screen shot of level one stats and bush positioning (Completed 11-7-12)

Updates:

[*] 11-12-12: Turned off the required post to vote. While it only requires for the first 20, I don't see that happening anytime soon. lol
[*] 11-8-12: Added "Six slots or Five" to items to help break down purchase order. Also added a funny warding screen shot and a match history photo from my own game.
[*] 11-7-12: Added credit to ovnoglavi for his idea in a better item explanation. Also added section in masteries about Improved Recall and Summoner's Insight . Added an alternate item section for defense.
[*] 11-6-12: Updated the guide with mouseovers and screen shots. No, I will not change Fin. I like that too much, lol. Also added in this section.
[*] 11-5-12: Finally finished and published guide because my friend needed help with his 3's gameplay.
[*] 9-14-12: I joined Mobafire and starting working on 3's Teemo guide.