Laners can take jungle mobs
When;
Jungle is busy ganking far away.
When;
You will not lose lane farm/EXP for being in the jungle taking mobs.
When;
You have enough sustain that taking jungle mobs will not cause you to take considerable damage that could negatively influence the outcome of the lane.
When;
Jungle is busy ganking far away.
When;
You will not lose lane farm/EXP for being in the jungle taking mobs.
When;
You have enough sustain that taking jungle mobs will not cause you to take considerable damage that could negatively influence the outcome of the lane.

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So I started thinking of how I could be falling behind when it seemed that I was doing at least "well" compared to the rest...and started to noticed that the jungles were getting cleared regardless of wether the jungler was ganking or focused on still farming. (I've also looked into the gold/second items).
Thinking that this must be how everyone is getting the advantage, I decide to go and clear some of the mobs myself, only to be yelled at "Graves get away from my mobs" by the jungler. I back off, thinking that maybe this guy was a bit overprotective....but in the next two games the same thing has happened.
So my question is: When is it ok for a laner to start taking jungle mobs? Aside from the obvious "every game is different", what are some cues or rules of thumb that I should look for before I start moving in? I don't see others asking the jungler if he's done...so there must be something I'm not picking up on.
Thanks for your help...