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Humor Guide by Bludes

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League of Legends Build Guide Author Bludes

The Ultimate Pet Guide [Finally Ready For Season 4!]

Bludes Last updated on August 19, 2014
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Normal Pets

[VS]

Rare Pets

Guide Top

Introduction




Okay, for everybody: This is a humour guide and has NOTHING to do with the regular gameplay, ect ,ect ,ect. Okay. If you thought this was a regular guide, then I'm sorry. For everyone else: Enjoy!





Welcome Summoners! My name is Sion and Today I wanna introduce YOU to my Ultimate Pet Guide.
You may ask yourself - what is the Ultimate Pets Guide, lord Sion? Haha! That is a good question my little Poppy and to answer that question I want to tell you something about my own life. I know, I know, you all are very excitet to hear that, so just be quiet. Thank you.
Okay... You guys know I was a part of many wars in summoners rift. I killed many people, even you.. Poppy. I'm glad you are okay. Anyways one day I was supposed to kill Nasus and another day Rengar. So you did? NO! OF COURSE NOT! You know why? I tell you why. These creatures are poor. They want to be governed. They told me, they hate their life and need hobbiess. And now it's up to you! Of course I slayed them, but they are alive. I know it.
Find these creatures and give them a better life. Make them as your pet. Give them clothes and food and maybe they start practising new hobbies. I don't know this. I am undead and sad. My wife left me.. I am green. WHY AM I GREEN? Go on... I'll stay here... and cry.



Guide Top

Pros / Cons Having a Pet




CONS

- There are situations when your pet wants you dead
- You have to buy expensive stuff for your pet
- You could get the wrong type of pet
- You have to educate your pet
- No more social life
- Your pet can die as well
- If it learns the wrong summoner spell you are - .
- Your pet has something like a puberty stage.
- How do you explain where babys come from?

PROS

+ You have a pet
+ Free food


Guide Top

Find a Beast




First of all it is very important to FIND a beast to have a pet.
There are a few methodes on how to find one but you should decide first which pet you would like to have. There are only a few avaiable, yet so choose wisely. This is so important like Ignite works on Brand.
After you did your choice I will explain the way to find and catch a beast.






Rengar is really shy and hard to find. There are only a few methods to find this cat. First of all make sure you got fish. I recommend you to be Fizz so you can sacrifice yourself. So after your operation go straight to any bush on summoner's rift. Start on the toplane. Now you just stay 10 seconds in the bush and wait. You must be level 6! Don't forget.If he's not in your bush, go straight to the next one. Garen may appear a few times but you have to focus. After you finally found Rengar what ever he's doing, doing - dance. This will provocate him and he starts chasing you. Now it is really important to throw your Ultimate right behind you. Rengar may now stop chasing you - if not - sorry for you. In 2% in all cases he jumps straight into your ultimate, catches the fish and got trapped! Now it's up to you how you get him out of your shark... But congratulation! You got him! I forget the sacrifice part...now you have to execute yourself. Really.





Nasus is not that hard to find like Rengar but it's even harder to catch him. First of all you need to kick Lucian in a big hole or be Pantheon. He is the fastest champ in the League right behind Football Nautilus. You will find Nasus most of the time farming on the toplane. He's not interested in the game. Minions are his game and you should keep this in mind. Use a bush to trap this dog. Try to avoid Garen's home. He will send Fiddlesticks crows after you which slows you. But you don't care. Just jump onto his face and smack him, all on the floor. Don't start a rap battle with him otherwise you will lose the fight and die. If you did not: Congratulations! You catched him!





Alistar is not hard to overlook. First of all make sure you are a cowboy. Alistar will only be pleased with a cobwoy. You have to catch him with a lasso and confine him after this. Try to be Thresh. In 9 out of 10 cases Alistar is located on the botlane. You need to hide in a bush and wait for his buddyguard going to base. Then it is your chance to grab him with your lasso. If you failed - you will be instantly knocked back and die a faithfully death. When you catch Alistar swing yourself into his warm arms and use your ultimate. If everything worked fine, you succesfully tamed Alistar! If not, you are dead.





Now Volibear is completly different. He is really hard to find. You have to search for those little pots that can be found on secret places. Even I don't know these because I had no blue buff in my life. Was that a hint? I don't think so. But! Before you start searching make sure you got a bear trap with you. This is the easiest way to catch this huge bear. Don't be too loud and don't disturb Volibear eating his honey. If you do, you are dead or he will run away. Place a trap just behind him and when he wants to catch you, he is the one who is caught.





Now it is time for Twitch, the french rat. If you want to find this beast you need a bit time .. much time. The rat can be anywhere on summoner's rift so it will be very hard to find it. There is a simple trick to make it easier for you: Look for a green, hairy body and you know it is Twitch. It could be Zac so make sure the body is hairy. If you found it finally make sure you have something to poison it. I should have mentioned this before... anyways if you are Singed it would be perfect because you have a gas-mask and won't poison yourself. So make sure you got the mask on! Then you go near to the rat and dance a bit around it. Usually it won't move. If the poison is all around its hairy body it's time for you to grab it. Don't be afraid just grab it! There is a funny sport with volibear when you grab him he starts grabbing you back. It's not even grabbing it's throwing behind you. Really, really fun. If you are interested here is a magic brochure.
Uhm.. where was I? Ah. So you throw the rat behind you and you got it! No questions. You captured it. My slave Fizz made the picture wrong. Gosh I need to buy more mushrooms for punishment. Anyways I just explained it so you should know what to do.




Congratulations! A shark ate a cat and you jumped on a dog. You broke a bear's leg and catched a cow with a Lasso... This is... great! Now one of these two creatures are in your property. If this was facebook I would give you a thumbs up! BUT! These are the ways to catch normal pets. There are also rare pets if you didn't know, yet. Sorry. I may explain to you what the difference is. So here you go!



Guide Top

Rare Pets




There are actually five rare pets you can find and "tame". You may ask now: "HEY Sion. WHAT'S THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN NORMAL AND RARE PETS, HUH?" Buddy. No need to scream. "SORRY!" ... Well - good question anyways. You may have noticed that your pet is at least 90% looking like an animal. The rare pets doesn't. The rare pets have a human and a beast form or at least more than 30% human features. There are exceptions I will talk about later but you have to keep this in mind! If you didn't get it I will explain it to you with a wonderful graphic from my ... partner Fizz.






As you can see this is just an example for a rare pet. I don't know if it excist or what name this creature has but if you see something like this you are 100% sure it's a rare pet even if it's isn't. You may ask now what you gonna do with the human form? Well.. If you train the beast form hard enough it won't go back to human form. It is the way you treat your pet. If you give it animal food it may stay in the beast form. When you make your pet presents like rings and stuff it may wants to marry me. (Most of the rare pets are female)






I said something about exceptions. Remember? These are pets which haven't got a second form and have to stay in their real only one boring human-beast form. They have again human and beast features. Again I have no Idea if this creature really excist.






There are five pets out there. Some of them are cool and some of them are even cooler.
I will now talk to you how to find and "tame" those creatures.




Guide Top

Find A Rare Beast


Guide Top

Masteries




Now after you cought the beast it is time for your masteries. The masteries are an important step to tame your beast. Don't think it is already tamed! No. Just no. It will wake up and eat your face. Sorry I didn't told you. But you would have been too afraid. What should you do now? Are you even listening? I am explaining right now... Okay. Are you listening? I don't mind if you don't... Anyways the key to a tamed pet is the Total Biscuit of Rejuvenation. Animals love these cookies and sometimes I take one, too. If you don't got this awesome cookie you'll die. So spend some points into Utillity! The rest about taming I will tell you later... now it is important to choose a role your pet will do. For example: You want a cat making you food, give it more attack speed and the cat will cut the vegetable *cough* the fast food more easily.
First of all you need to know, which abilitys the pets can learn. I should have told you about that before... nevermind.










  • Savagery: This Ability allows your cat to cut any food or bodys you give to it. By activating Thrill of the Hunt your cat is able making twice of the food in a minute as usual.
  • Battle Roar: This ability allows your cat to dissipate the damn crows on your pumkin field. If you have no pumpkin field... I'm sorry. By activating Thrill of the Hunt your cat is able to growl even louder which has no special effect on anything.
  • Bola Strike: This ability allows your cat fishing fresh Fizz. Oh the irony... By activating Thrill of the Hunt your cat will use glow to stick Fizz on his claws. This is written on this paper in front of me. I'm just repeating.
  • Thrill of the Hunt: This ability allows your cat to be invisible and avoid trouble. By activating Thrill of the Hunt it will be activated.










  • Siphoning Strike: This Ability allows your dog to clean the floor. By activating the skill the dog feels an adrenaline rush and destroy and type of dirt.
  • Wither: This ability allows your dog to expel anything you don't like. Here is something important for you: Don't stress your dog or make him hate you or you will stink the rest of your life.
  • Spirit Fire: This ability allows your dog to create a dancefloor. The dancefloor is not healthy for you, but cola is not either right?
  • Fury of the Sands: This ability allows your dog to grow. He will soon be old for a few seconds and then go back to his normal size. This is useful to scare people or guard your house.










  • Pulverize: This Ability allows your cow to punch the ground as hard as your cow wants to. This is very useful for agriculture or dig holes.
  • Headbutt: This ability allows your cow to push any objects and human beings with much power as possible away. This could be useful for bowling.
  • Triumphant Roar: This ability allows your cow to make green rain appear on your body. Why? I don't know.
  • Unbreakable Will: This ability allows your cow to goes completly Man-Mode. Your cow will start farting like never before.










  • Rolling Thunder: This Ability allows your bear to walk on all fours. Your bear starts cultivating backwards...
  • Frenzy: This ability allows your bear to eat even bigger things like a wild living Teemo. Your bear can be used as food taster but sometimes he will eat everything.
  • Majestic Roar: This ability is similar to your the cat's scream. This time your bear is the screaming one. This is useful ... wait. I don't know. For the same thing as the cat. :s
  • Thunder Claws: This ability allows your bear to use the power of the thunders to roast your food to make it even daintier.







Expunge


  • Ambush: This Ability allows your rat to become invisible and do what ever an invisible rat does. ;)
  • Venom Cask: This ability allows your rat to open any flasks and bottles and tip the conten after that out. This could be useful for.. uh.. It's useful that your rat can open it!
  • Expunge Expunge: This ability can only be used after your rat opened a bottle and pit the content on the ground. Your rat starts throwing anything on it and it starts to mold. This is useful for a food intoxication.
  • Spray and Pray: This ability allows your cat to create its own spray can to make ugly "art" in your house. If your cat became invisible a few moments before then it's unstoppable. (Nearly legendary ba dumm ts)





Now that you know what every skill does it is time for you to choose your masteries! As I said a few lines before: You HAVE to take the awesome cookie with you otherwise you'll die.






If you wanna improve the cutting skill for your cat, give it some extra damage to cut even throw stone. You ask why the cat would do that? Stone soup. Very healthy. If you want to improve it's scream for your pumkin field, giver your cat some more defense to avoid enemy attacks. If you want to improve your fishing skill, give your cat a bit attack speed and movement speed for faster reactions. If you want to improve its invisible skill.. no. You don't want to.





If you want to improve your dog's dishmop skill, give him some extra damage to punch the dirt even harder. If you want to improve the "chasing people you hate away "skill, you may give him some health for punches on his head and movement speed to run away even faster. If you want to improve his dancefloor skill give your dog some movement speed for the tight moves and a bit health to say longer healthy. If you want to improve his "I AM A BIG DOG" skill give him some cooldown reduction.





If you want to improve your agriculture, take attack damage runes with you. This can destroy your ground so keep in mind that you shouldn't overdo it.
If you want to improve the bowling skill take attack speed and movement speed with you to make your pet even faster. If you want to improve the green rain thing take ability power with you. If you want to improve the man-mode take energy runes with you! Your pet will stay in this mode even longer.





If you want to improve the back-evolving thing take movement speed with you to do it even faster. If you want to improve the food taster skill take attack damage with you. Don't use attack speed or you won't see the food again.
If you want to imrpove the scream take some energy with you! If you want to improve the thunder claws take again energy runes with you. This will improve the time of heating.





If you want to improve the invisible skill you should take some energy with you because it's really exhausting. I know that. I'm nearly a ghost. If you want to improve opening bottles and flasks you should take attack speed and some damage with you so your pet can open them even faster! If you want to improve the mold you should take Zilean with you. He can do this.
If you want to improve the spray are you should take some experience with you to make even uglier art!



These are not the only skills your pet can learn. I will talk about this later, now it's important to talk about taming and food and stuff.


Guide Top

Taming And Food And Stuff




This is part is really important because now you may become your pet. MAY? Yes. May. If the beast doesn't like you after you released it, it may eat you. Be sure you are not Fizz or Jurassic Cho'Gath. But I will explain it now detailed. First of all you have to go to a safe place like the enemy's base or in front of Baron Nashor . If you think you are safe, take the Total Biscuit of Rejuvenation out of your pocket. You have no pocket?! Not my problem. Now stand on one foot and raise your hands with the cookie in your hand in the air and say these magical words: "Sion. You are so cool. I love your green. I don't know why you have no girlfriend. Marry me." and the beast will appear in front of you. If this doesn't work try open the cave you put the beast in before. But try the first thing first. Otherwise it may not work. If you did everything right, the beast will now eat out of your hand and loses it's ferocity instantly. If you did something wrong, your arm is now gone.





Congratulations! You successfully tamed your beast. Now it is YOUR cat/dog. You may ask what you do now. If you don't I will tell you anyways. Your pet now needs regulary food to survive. It has no killing abilitys anymore and is your creation. It's now in your hand what the pet will be if it grows up. Maybe a popstar or maybe a mother? *cough* I talked about food, didn't I? Well my friend. You are lucky. Your pet only needs something to drink. The store doesn't even sell you food. Anyways there is a huge list of drinks you can give your pet. I will explain them to you and you can choose which drinks you wanna give your pet.






Item Sequence











Mana Potion
35

Elixir of Fortitude
350

Elixir of Brilliance
250

Oracle's Elixir
400

Crystalline Flask
345

Chalice of Harmony
800

Athene's Unholy Grail
2250



There are 3 types of drinks your pet can get. The drinks which can be used 1-2 times, the drinks that can be used 3-5 times and the drinks that can be used 6-8 times. After you gave your pet something to drink you have to give it every 5 hours new ... water. Some drinks are cheaper than others but can be used less often.


Very cheap drink but can only be used one time.

Costs as much as the Health Potion but can be used twice.

Costs much more than the Health Potion and Mana Potion but can be used three times in a row.

Costs less than Elixir of Fortitude and can be used four times. Oh the logic...

costs more than Elixir of Fortitude but can be used five times.

It costs less than Oracle's Elixir and even less than Elixir of Fortitude... what is this here? It can be used six times...

Very expensive. Can be used seven times.

Most expensive drink in history of drinks. Can be used eight times.



This shows, that you shouldn't buy the Athene's Unholy Grail. I recommend you a few Mana Potions and the Crystalline Flask for your pet. If you don't care buy the Athene's Unholy Grail your pet may feel special. I don't know. I have no pet. I have no pet and I am making this guide... Nevermind.



Guide Top

Education




Education? You want me to educate my pet?! Yes. But don't take the Teemo Mushroom now. It's too early! Education is very important for every pet out there. Now that your pet is still alive and not dead, yet it is time for the education! If you want to leave this part out, go on. But keep in mind that your pet won't be able to learn abilitys which help you. They can't practise there hobbies and are completly useless like Shaco in lategame. Keep that in mind. Did you? Okay.






To learn things your pet shoud learn you need to buy books. These books can be found in the store. Start by buying Amplifying Tome. Go on with Morellonomicon and then Mejai's Soulstealer. Be sure your pet understood everything. This can be noticed when your pet does a noise like "Uh" or "Ah". If you hear something like "hhhhh..." it needs water. After your pet understood the three books it's time for Will of the Ancients. With every new book they've read they learn new words. If you now want your pet to learn a skill like cutting vegetable you have to make notes and give them to read. I'll make an example.














After you gave your pet the first book it is able to learn one word. In this case "cutting" which means your pet is now able to cut vegetables and anything else. But your pet may be very slow. After you gave your pet the last book it is able to use these three words to improve its cutting skill. "cutting even faster" If you gave it some bonus like attack damage it will improve cutting much faster than a pet without this bonus attack damage. But! Keep always in mind: Your pet can't learn something like "fly to heaven fly to heaven fly to heaven". This is not possible. It has no skill for that. You can discover new ways to use your skills and write it on those papers. You only need to buy those books once and from that you can give your pet letters with three words. It will improve by doing as I said and sometimes it will hurt himself. Just cuddle a bit. I know you want.




Guide Top

***ecoires And Clothes




This is the most fun and challenging part of this guide. It's no time to dress your pet up! Animal abuse? Non-sense! Use any of the clothes and ***ecoires u can find in the store. Your pet will not only look fabulous as much as possible - it will start loving you more and more. Every pet has a special type and wants special clothes. There are only a few pets who pleased with the objects in the store. Be creative and invent new clothes and ***ecoires for your pet. Here is a list of all types and their cautious.






The Nobleman If your pet is a nobleman it won't be pleased with normal food, normal people and normal clothes. When your pet quits drinking out of mana potion you need to buy it Athene's Unholy Grail. Exspensive? Well... You nearly killed your pet with a shark or your spear...
Anyways would your pet like to wear a crown and a dress, ect.





The Sportsman If your pet is a sportsman it just has to move everytime. It can address itself with a basketball for hours. The sportsmann wants to eat healthy food and would like to learn cutting vegetables. He would like to wear a leotard.





The Farmer If your pet is a farmer it doesn't really care about his look. It loves nature and trys to grow everything it can. It would love to have the right tools for field and a good hat to protect its head of the sun.





The Popstar If your pet is a popstar it starts to sing everytime. This doesn't mean that it CAN sing. It wants to be famous and might be gay. Your pet wants to have a good microphone and a cool haircut. Some fans would be nice as well. It only wants the best drinks and if you don't give it what it wants it will call a friend and leave you.





The Frenchman If your pet is a Frenchman it may starts learning speaking. This is good if you are french, too for everyone else it could be even more annoying. If you have a ret there is a high chance that it is a frenchman. Characteristic for the frenchman is the baguette and the croisannt in its hands. When it starts playing video games there is a high chance of being insulted.





The Sleeper If your pet is a sleeper it is very calm. It doesn't know what's going on the whole time and doesn't care about drinking. You can match the pet with a tipical bronce 5 player. The sleeper wants comfortable clothes and doesn't really care about his optic.





The Rapper If your pet is a rapper it may use words you don't understand. It would trying to do some rhymes and bait you. Miss Fortunetly they can not speak. They only want the cooles drink and a good microphone in their hands. A cap would be good as well.





The Minger If your pet is a Minger it stinks like hell. Everytime you see it you have to poke. The marks of a Minger is the poop on his head and the cheese in its hand. I'm really sorry if your pet is this type...





The Cook If your pet is a Cook it will make all your food no matter what summoner spells or skills it is able to do. Your pet will automatically starts occupy the kitchen. If you are doing something wrong you will be punished. Trust me - there are a lot of things you can do wrong. BUT! You get free good food and you have to pay every single grocerie.





The Ugly One Some of the pets are allready ugly.. raticulous? I know. Anyway when your pet is the ugly one it starts wearing the ugliest clothes and ***ecoires. It may start eating tons of damage I mean tons of fastfood. The problem is they think they look fabulous like Taric. But honestly, they don't.








There are much more pet types out there we didn't discover, yet! Create your own clothes and ***ecoires for your pet. If non of these types apply to your pet then try new clothes and ***ecoires out yourself! If the worst comes to the worst you'll die and if then the worst comes to the worst you will lagging like jesus and respawn after three days. But you won't notice that because... you are dead. Like me..




Guide Top

Runes




Runes? NOW? Yes. Now. Runes are important for your pet to learn its two special skills. You can call them: Summoners Spells. When your pet reaches a certain time it will start practising one of the summoner spells. How long ? I don't know. I am making this guide but I don't know anything, okay? Anyways... If you want your pet to learn this spell faster then you have to take the right runes. Here is a quick list of all summoner spells and the right runes.






Runes

Greater Mark of Armor
9

Greater Seal of Armor
9

Greater Glyph of Armor
9

Greater Quintessence of Armor
3
This summoners spell allows your pet to create a barrier which deals huge damage to enemy cats. It can only learned by a dog. To avoid that the body of your dog brakes in two use armor and health runes to sustain the huge pressure.


Runes

Greater Quintessence of Energy
3

Greater Seal of Energy Regeneration
9

Greater Glyph of Energy
9

Greater Mark of Ability Power
9
This summoners spell allows your pet to see throw walls... and clothes. This is not very useful because only your pet sees this. The spell can only be learned by a cat. Take energy runes with you because this spell costs a lot of energy and your cat needs it if the cat gets caught.


Runes

Greater Mark of Ability Power
9

Greater Seal of Ability Power
9

Greater Glyph of Ability Power
9

Greater Quintessence of Ability Power
3
This summoner spell allowys you to copy Master Yi. You will meditate a bit to gain new energy for work. Use ability power for the meditation.


Runes

Greater Quintessence of Lethality
3

Greater Mark of Lethality
9

Greater Seal of Attack Damage
9

Greater Glyph of Attack Damage
9
This summoner spell allows your pet to clean the floor even faster. By activating this spell any type of dirt will instantly fall of and disappear. Take Attack damage and armor penetration with you to punch the dirt.


Runes

Greater Quintessence of Experience
3

Greater Mark of Cooldown Reduction
9

Greater Seal of Cooldown Reduction
9

Greater Glyph of Cooldown Reduction
9
This summoner spell is completly useless. It allows your pet to be exhausted even faster. Take experience and cooldown reduction with you to learn this skill even faster.


Runes

Greater Glyph of Ability Power
9

Greater Seal of Ability Power
9

Greater Mark of Ability Power
9

Greater Quintessence of Ability Power
3
This summoner spell allows your pet to flash away like a jumper. After learning this spell you need to search a new pet. Take ability power with you to learn it even faster.


Runes

Greater Glyph of Ability Power
9

Greater Seal of Ability Power
9

Greater Mark of Ability Power
9

Greater Quintessence of Ability Power
3
This summoner spell allows your pet to become invisible. For ever. You won't find it anymore. To learn this spell even faster, take ability power with you!


Runes

Greater Glyph of Ability Power
9

Greater Seal of Ability Power
9

Greater Mark of Ability Power
9

Greater Quintessence of Ability Power
3
This summoner spell allows your pet to study medicine. It will start to bandage you without any reason. Your pet needs a lot of ability power for this process.


Runes

Greater Glyph of Ability Power
9

Greater Seal of Ability Power
9

Greater Mark of Ability Power
9

Greater Quintessence of Ability Power
3
This summoner spell allows your pet burn your house down. Ignite can be mistaken for Brand so keep this in mind!


Runes

Greater Quintessence of Attack Damage
3

Greater Mark of Attack Damage
9

Greater Seal of Attack Damage
9

Greater Glyph of Attack Damage
9
This summoner spell allows your pet to copy the emperor. Thunders will soon coming out of it's body and kill everything about it. To let your pet dealing more damage take attack damage with you.


Runes

Greater Glyph of Ability Power
9

Greater Seal of Ability Power
9

Greater Mark of Ability Power
9

Greater Quintessence of Ability Power
3
This summoner spell allows your pet to teleport where ever it wants to. Be aware to find a new one soon. To learn this spell even faster, take ability power with you.





So all in all these summoner spells are useless. Damn. Anyways they may be really fun to your pet. Take no runes with you if you don't want to die. If you want to, go ahead. :)




Guide Top

Hobbies




You thought pets have no hobbies? Because you are not good at thinking.. Every pet, cat or dog, wants hobbies. If you don't let them practising their hobbies, they will break out and you won't see them again. So be smart and let them doing what they want to. There is a list of all hobbies and the items you need to buy for them.







When your pet starts acting agressive it may hate you or it wants to practise swordplay. There are two options now: You could buy your pet a Wii with Wii Sports Resorts or you could buy your pet a Lich Bane but be aware of being backstapped.

When your pet starts flying out of the window a few times it may wants to commit suicide or it wants to practise archery. This can only be learned buy a cat. If you agree with this hobby you can go to the store and by a sexy bow for your cat. In this case: The Lightbringer.

When your pet starts doing strange moves with a stick it may have seen Harry Potter, is dumb or wants to practise magic. This can only be practised by a dog. If you agree being the owner of a wizard dog, you should go to the store and buy a fake wand.



When your pet starts looking outside into the jungle be aware that they want to practise gardening. They want to care about the flowers, the grass and anything which is within the garden. If you agree with this hobby you need to buy your pet a Blackfire Torch.

When your pet starts looking to the mountains there are two options. It hates you or it wants to be a miner. This can be very useful to earn money. Sometimes your pet will bring some gold to you and you could sell it. If you agree with this hobby buy your pet a Pickaxe.

When your pet starts running all the time it may be a sportsman type or it wants to practise athletics. If you agree with this hobby, go on and buy your pet the Boots of Mobility. Your pet may become much more stronger and win prices from the dogs and cats jury.



When your pet starts acting like a person you know from a videogame it may loves videogames and/or wants to be a cosplayer. From now on it will act like any virtual charakter. This is useful to have a conversation with any virtual thing you want to. The bad thing about it is that your pet can't talk. If you want to let it then buy it a Thornmail.

When your pet starts punching you there are two options. Either your pet wants you dead or it wants to practise boxing. At this point you should buy something like Guardian Angel to survive these punches. There is no solution to avoid these. If you want to let him stop you should buy him this Iceborn Gauntlet.If you are lucky it starts going to the gym and you survive.

When your pet starts reading books you are trying to educate it or it starts being interested in books. This is very useful for the education as well because it will learning new words which can be used for the education. Of course it won't understand anything of the book because... it's a pet but it will smiling because it thinks it is something special. If you want to let your pet thinking this you should buy it the Fiendish Codex.







These are the hobbies your pet can practise. I have said this word a few times till now... Practise..practise...practise practise practise practise practise practise practise practise practise practise practise practise practise practise practise practise practise practise practise practise practise practise practise practise practise practise practise practise practise practise practise practise practise practise practise practise practise practise practise practise practise practise practise practise practise practise practise practise
... is this the process of a pet being educated? Interesting...




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Breeding




You thought you know everything about you and your pet? No. Now it's getting interesting! I can't believe you made it to this point. Anyways it's time for you to learn how to breed. If you don't able to do this your pet will die because of no love. You love your pet? That doesn't mean your pet loves you like you your pet. Get it? Your pet needs to find a girl friend and make petlove.
Are you listening? All right. First of all it is very important to know your pets specific item. here is a quick list of them.






Bonetooth Necklace This necklace is for your cat. It represents the terror and fear of the civilisation.


This bone scepter is for your dog. It's very healthy and good for your dog's teeth.


This bell is used to stop your cow's anger.


This thing was used once to protect the bear babys from trouble and death.


It is used for a rat to improve his damage by his claws. Claws...





Now that you know what every single specific item for your pet is you should know what to do next. Or do you want to stop here? I could let you alone AND YOU COULD FIGURE IT OUT YOURSELF? HOW IS THAT? HOW IS THAT, HUH?! *cough*.. Sorry. Alistar's anger came over me. I am sorry.

A little bit. Okaay... After this you need to find.. another Beast your pet should make love with. There are a few options now how to go on. I recommend you to read the "How To Find A Beast" thing again to consider what beast you want to find. For example: You want to have the cow for your cat as girlfriend you have to search the cow. Sounds logic. And where is the cow? There it is, Dora! Exactly! It is right on the botlane. We had this discussion earlier. So what you are gonna do now. Sneak with your pet next to you to the beast. Now take your pet and throw it in the beast's face. This should immobilised it. Now take the specific item of your pet and give it to the beast on the bround. Give it in its hands or.. I don't know. It should feel it on its body.

Oh. I've forgotten an important rule. You can't breed every pet with every beast.
There are rules I should have told you.. If you don't listen to me the beast will instantly focus on your leg and attack it. Why the leg? To make you stop running of course. I don't want to go in detail but it will do the same thing it will do to your pet and you don't want this...
So here is a quick list which pets you can breed with which beasts.






Spoiler: Click to view




Now that you know which pets you can tame with which beasts you should know what to do. I already told you that? Uhm..okay.. I will just.. hook in .. you know. Okay. Ooooooooookay. So, the beast is no senseless and you gave the item to it. Now you should tell your pet to stand in front of the beast. You may have educated him for that. Nevermind. Now it's time for you to run away. If your pet likes the beast - that's another point. It will trys to stand up because.. you throw it. You should run away anyways. Where was I? Ah. If your pet likes the beast it will trying to help the beast up. Then it will come to an ambarr***ing moment and the beast will search for something that it can make your pet as present. Theeeeeeeeere is the specific item. Now they will go away - make whatever they want - break up - and you will have a pet baby in a few days. What if the beast is the female? That's not possible. Have fun!



Guide Top

Summary




And this is everything you should know to get a pet, have a pet, trade a pet and lose your pet.
I hope you guys enjoyed this humor guide. It was reaaally fun to make especially the pictures. As always I thank you so much for reading and giving me feedback. I am 100% sure there a many mistakes in this text but I hope you can forgive me. Otherwise I will try to tame you with a cookie. Just sayin'.
As I said I would love to see your feedback and what pet would you choose with that hobbies and skills and why and what clothes would they wear?

Here is an example:

If I had a pet I would choose the dog. My dog would be the sportsman type and he wears a black jersey and got a football in his right hands. He is the best in making a dancefloor but bad in guarding my house. He is able to do a Barrier and the Flash but he didn't left me, yet.

Let me know your pet!

Btw: Did you find the easter egg? I Mean the REAL one.


To Do List:
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In Development:
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- Bludes :)


Changelog:
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