That's the beauty of solo queue.
There's got to be a balance, however. Tanks should be trying to be as much of a threat as they can, so they should be dealing damage in addition to defending the carry. Also, defending the carry should only be to an extent - don't die to try and save your carry unless you KNOW that they'll get less money for you. Often times they'll just kill both of your, or you'll die when the carry still had flash or ghost ready.
There's got to be a balance, however. Tanks should be trying to be as much of a threat as they can, so they should be dealing damage in addition to defending the carry. Also, defending the carry should only be to an extent - don't die to try and save your carry unless you KNOW that they'll get less money for you. Often times they'll just kill both of your, or you'll die when the carry still had flash or ghost ready.
Yeah you got a point. Here is an example of what I am trying to say.
Teamfight is getting ready a jarvan (who I am assuming their tank was) gets really bloodthirsty pops his ult trapping one of our lower hp comrades with him. While he did my teammates and I are given a clear shot at the carries. Needless to say I the tank first one soak up most of the damage, and we slaughter the undefended carries. They try and retreat, and jarvan attempts to come to thier aid, but too late. Few ,if any, get away we turn around and slaughter Jarvan.
He is what I would call a fail tank, due to his inabillity to control his bloodthirst, which ended up leading to a loss for his team.
Alright different game, I'm still tanking, and a teamfight goes poorly for us. Just me and a Ezreal left, who was on a killing spree. I decide that overall the Ezreal will do more damage then me, and there is little to no hope of me getting out alive. Meaning that they are less likely to towerdive him, who can just teleport places. Not to mention I'm buying time for my dead comrades to come back to life. So I tell the Ez to GTFO! Needless to say he does, they go after the me. I die, but the Ez gets away and three of my other teammates come back to life. They are unable to push.
This is what I would a sucessful tanking, for there is more then just gold (although it does help). Though usually you will find me saving the carries, and just sitting there in the middle of them spamming all my skills. If I'm going down I'm going to make sure they don't walk away, or walk away unscathed that is.
Teamfight is getting ready a jarvan (who I am assuming their tank was) gets really bloodthirsty pops his ult trapping one of our lower hp comrades with him. While he did my teammates and I are given a clear shot at the carries. Needless to say I the tank first one soak up most of the damage, and we slaughter the undefended carries. They try and retreat, and jarvan attempts to come to thier aid, but too late. Few ,if any, get away we turn around and slaughter Jarvan.
He is what I would call a fail tank, due to his inabillity to control his bloodthirst, which ended up leading to a loss for his team.
Alright different game, I'm still tanking, and a teamfight goes poorly for us. Just me and a Ezreal left, who was on a killing spree. I decide that overall the Ezreal will do more damage then me, and there is little to no hope of me getting out alive. Meaning that they are less likely to towerdive him, who can just teleport places. Not to mention I'm buying time for my dead comrades to come back to life. So I tell the Ez to GTFO! Needless to say he does, they go after the me. I die, but the Ez gets away and three of my other teammates come back to life. They are unable to push.
This is what I would a sucessful tanking, for there is more then just gold (although it does help). Though usually you will find me saving the carries, and just sitting there in the middle of them spamming all my skills. If I'm going down I'm going to make sure they don't walk away, or walk away unscathed that is.
In my eyes there is only justice

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Jarvan's ultimate takes a great deal of skill to use in the middle of the fight. He should think of it less like a cage for 1 poor soul, but like an anivia wall or trundle pillar. Especially since your allies can't rape the carry while he's in a cage, Jarvan should instead ult whoever they want out of the fight - non-shen tanks (unless he can't use his dash somehow), or supports. Also, Jarvan should check for who has flash to avoid ulting them.
Alright getting a little off topic, but here is something I would like to point out. Normally carries are usually the ones on a killing spree, so 8 times out of 10 they are worth more gold then you so. I'd say it would be a fiar trade off.
In my eyes there is only justice

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A tank should never have an issue with dying to save his team, that's what he's there for. Of course, as Rudmed stated, carries are 8 times out of 10 worth more gold.
Here's an example: I was Malphite, and after we had a bad teamfight, Master Yi, Xin Zhao, and me were running away from the enemies, who also had 3 people left. I had about half health and my two teammates had 1/4 health left. I had my ult, but instead of using it to get away, I ulted the chasing enemies and killed one, but the point is, I saved my teammates who were on a rampage. The enemy got less gold for me, and my teammates were able to defend the base until the rest of us were back.
Under most circumstances, the tank should be able to sacrifice himself for the carry, so long as they have the power to defend the base, or as long as the enemy will get less gold for you.
One last note: A tank should never sacrifice himself if the carry can get away without your help.
Here's an example: I was Malphite, and after we had a bad teamfight, Master Yi, Xin Zhao, and me were running away from the enemies, who also had 3 people left. I had about half health and my two teammates had 1/4 health left. I had my ult, but instead of using it to get away, I ulted the chasing enemies and killed one, but the point is, I saved my teammates who were on a rampage. The enemy got less gold for me, and my teammates were able to defend the base until the rest of us were back.
Under most circumstances, the tank should be able to sacrifice himself for the carry, so long as they have the power to defend the base, or as long as the enemy will get less gold for you.
One last note: A tank should never sacrifice himself if the carry can get away without your help.

Any ship can be a minesweeper... once.
But I like sacrficing myself.
In my eyes there is only justice

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sorry to post off topic for a sec but that freeweek jarvan was so bad...
i once saw a game where enemy jarvan would ult kass and then he'd just riftwalk out. needless to say jarvan didnt know how to turn off his ult (or he chose not too) and remained in the circle for those few seconds.
as for staying on topic, what do you guys define as a tank? because the majority of the people i've seen say that stacking health/resists doesnt make you a tank.
i once saw a game where enemy jarvan would ult kass and then he'd just riftwalk out. needless to say jarvan didnt know how to turn off his ult (or he chose not too) and remained in the circle for those few seconds.
as for staying on topic, what do you guys define as a tank? because the majority of the people i've seen say that stacking health/resists doesnt make you a tank.
I like things that make me feel stupid. - Ken Levine
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In my eyes there is only justice
Thank you Xiaowiriamujhoijhoi JEFFY40HANDS JakofSpaydes
Check out my AP/AD TF Build