Who Should You Play Today?

[quote=jhoijhoi]INSTRUCTIONS: Click the answer to the first question. You will then be taken to another question to answer - this question will be at the top of your screen. Keep clicking through answers until you have found a champion to play. Expand the spoilers for said champions. ^^ Enjoy! [center][size=5]❀ ❁ ❃ ❋ [size=5]Do you hate skillshots with a passion? [columns][size=5][goto=1]>> Yes <<[/goto] [nextcol][size=5][goto=20]>> No <<[/goto][/columns] [size=5]❀ ❁ ❃ ❋ [anchor=24][size=5]Are you a proficient keyboard face-roller of the QWER buttons? [columns][size=5]>> Yes << [spoiler=You should play...][icon=sona size=60][icon=zed size=60][icon=leblanc size=60][/spoiler] [nextcol][size=5][goto=25]>> No <<[/goto][/columns] [size=5]❀ ❁ ❃ ❋ [anchor=5][size=5]Just press R! [columns][size=5]>> Yes << [spoiler=You should play...][icon=kayle size=60][icon=karthus size=60][icon=tryndamere size=60][/spoiler] [nextcol][size=5][goto=6]>> No <<[/goto][/columns] [size=5]❀ ❁ ❃ ❋ [anchor=15][size=5]What do you find in graveyards? [columns][size=5]>> Yes << [spoiler=You should play...][icon=graves size=60][/spoiler] [nextcol][size=5][goto=16]>> No <<[/goto][/columns] [size=5]❀ ❁ ❃ ❋ [anchor=8][size=5]Do you like surprises? [columns][size=5][goto=9]>> Yes <<[/goto] [nextcol][size=5]>> No << [spoiler=You should play...]TOO BAD - SURPRISES LIKE YOU! [icon=evelynn size=60][icon=fiddlesticks size=60][/spoiler][/columns] [size=5]❀ ❁ ❃ ❋ [anchor=21][size=5]Do you like making people rage? [columns][size=5]>> Yes << [spoiler=You should play...][icon=fizz size=60][icon=urgot size=60][icon=kalista size=60][/spoiler] [nextcol][size=5][goto=22]>> No <<[/goto][/columns] [size=5]❀ ❁ ❃ ❋ [anchor=3][size=5]Do you want to torture your foe until they bleed out? [columns][size=5]>> Yes << [spoiler=You should play...][icon=teemo size=60][icon=cassiopeia size=60][icon=darius size=60][icon=tristana size=60][/spoiler] [nextcol][size=5][goto=4]>> No <<[/goto][/columns] [size=5]❀ ❁ ❃ ❋ [anchor=7][size=5]Too young to be tied down with a relationship? [columns][size=5]>> Yes << [spoiler=You should play...][icon=master yi size=60][icon=miss fortune size=60][/spoiler] [nextcol][size=5][goto=8]>> No <<[/goto][/columns] [size=5]❀ ❁ ❃ ❋ [anchor=12][size=5]Are people naturally drawn to you? [columns][size=5][goto=13]>> Yes <<[/goto] [nextcol][size=5]>> No << [spoiler=You should play...][icon=galio size=60][icon=diana size=60][icon=orianna size=60][icon=rammus size=60][/spoiler][/columns] [size=5]❀ ❁ ❃ ❋ [anchor=20][size=5]Do you like taking people on magical journeys? [columns][size=5]>> Yes << [spoiler=You should play...][icon=thresh size=60][icon=blitzcrank size=60][icon=skarner size=60][icon=lee sin size=60][icon=azir size=60][/spoiler] [nextcol][size=5][goto=21]>> No <<[/goto][/columns] [size=5]❀ ❁ ❃ ❋ [anchor=41][size=5]What do these champions have in common? [columns][size=5]>> Yes << [spoiler=You should play...]Absolutely nothing. I really couldn't think of anything. Feel free, if you got this far, to come up with some jokes about these champions and I'll add in some extra steps. [icon=trundle size=60][icon=vayne size=60][icon=bard size=60][icon=cho'gath size=60][icon=gragas size=60][icon=kha'zix size=60][icon=syndra size=60][icon=talon size=60][icon=vel'koz size=60][icon=zilean size=60][/spoiler] [nextcol][size=5]>> END <<[/columns] [size=5]❀ ❁ ❃ ❋ [anchor=29][size=5]Contestants for the next Wet T-Shirt competition? [columns][size=5]>> Yes << [spoiler=You should play...][icon=draven size=60][icon=lucian size=60][icon=Yasuo size=60][icon=braum size=60][icon=pantheon size=60][icon=jayce size=60][/spoiler] [nextcol][size=5][goto=11]>> No <<[/goto][/columns] [size=5]❀ ❁ ❃ ❋ [anchor=1][size=5]Do you love pets? [columns][size=5]>> Yes << [spoiler=You should play...][icon=annie size=60][icon=Malzahar size=60][icon=Maokai size=60][icon=Mordekaiser size=60][icon=Shaco size=60][icon=Yorick size=60][/spoiler] [nextcol][size=5][goto=2]>> No <<[/goto][/columns] [size=5]❀ ❁ ❃ ❋ [anchor=14][size=5]Are you sick of building the same thing every game? [columns][size=5][goto=15]>> Yes <<[/goto] [nextcol][size=5]>> No << [spoiler=You should play...][icon=rengar size=60][icon=viktor size=60][/spoiler][/columns] [size=5]❀ ❁ ❃ ❋ [anchor=25][size=5]Do you like second chances to make a good impression? [columns][size=5]>> Yes << [spoiler=You should play...][icon=aatrox size=60][icon=anivia size=60][icon=kog'maw size=60][icon=sion size=60][icon=zac size=60][/spoiler] [nextcol][size=5][goto=26]>> No <<[/goto][/columns] [size=5]❀ ❁ ❃ ❋ [anchor=9][size=5]Do you often find yourself out of mana? [columns][size=5]>> Yes << [spoiler=You should play...][icon=akali size=60][icon=katarina size=60][icon=renekton size=60][icon=ryze size=60][/spoiler] [nextcol][size=5][goto=10]>> No <<[/goto][/columns] [size=5]❀ ❁ ❃ ❋ [anchor=27][size=5]Did you like Animorphs as a child? [columns][size=5]>> Yes << [spoiler=You should play...][icon=elise size=60][icon=nidalee size=60][icon=shyvana size=60][icon=gnar size=60][/spoiler] [nextcol][size=5][goto=28]>> No <<[/goto][/columns] [size=5]❀ ❁ ❃ ❋ [anchor=11][size=5]Are you the type who lets nothing hold you back? [columns][size=5]>> Yes << [spoiler=You should play...][icon=olaf size=60][icon=gangplank size=60][/spoiler] [nextcol][size=5][goto=12]>> No <<[/goto][/columns] [size=5]❀ ❁ ❃ ❋ [anchor=16][size=5]Do you like gapclosers? [columns][size=5]>> Yes << [spoiler=You should play...][icon=nocturne size=60][icon=rek'sai size=60][icon=vi size=60][/spoiler] [nextcol][size=5][goto=17]>> No <<[/goto][/columns] [size=5]❀ ❁ ❃ ❋ [anchor=40][size=5]You're the sort of person who hates petting zoos, right? [columns][size=5][goto=41]>> Yes <<[/goto] [nextcol][size=5]>> No << [spoiler=You should play...][icon=nunu size=60][icon=udyr size=60][icon=hecarim size=60][icon=quinn size=60][/spoiler][/columns] [size=5]❀ ❁ ❃ ❋ [anchor=6][size=5]"They're MINERALS, Maree!" [columns][size=5]>> Yes << [spoiler=You should play...][icon=malphite size=60][icon=taric size=60][/spoiler] [nextcol][size=5][goto=7]>> No <<[/goto][/columns] [size=5]❀ ❁ ❃ ❋ [anchor=22][size=5]Let our powers combine - Earth, Fire, Wind, Water, Heart! [columns][size=5]>> Yes << [spoiler=You should play...][icon=zyra size=60][icon=brand size=60][icon=janna size=60][icon=nami size=60][icon=ahri size=60][/spoiler] [nextcol][size=5][goto=23]>> No <<[/goto][/columns] [size=5]❀ ❁ ❃ ❋ [anchor=2][size=5]When a teamfight goes sour, you get out alive and everyone else on your team dies? [columns][size=5]>> Yes << [spoiler=You should play...][icon=alistar size=60][icon=kassadin size=60][icon=singed size=60][icon=poppy size=60][icon=vladimir size=60][icon=wukong size=60][/spoiler] [nextcol][size=5][goto=3]>> No <<[/goto][/columns] [size=5]❀ ❁ ❃ ❋ [anchor=13][size=5]Void champions use punctuation in their names and are purple. [columns][size=5][goto=14]>> Yes <<[/goto] [nextcol][size=5]>> No << [spoiler=You should play...][icon=dr. mundo size=60][/spoiler][/columns] [size=5]❀ ❁ ❃ ❋ [anchor=19][size=5]Do you like writing guides about Sivir? [columns][size=5]>> Yes << [spoiler=You should play...][icon=fleet of foot size=60][icon=sivir][icon=mastery fleet of foot size=60][/spoiler] [nextcol][size=5][goto=40]>> No <<[/goto][/columns] [size=5]❀ ❁ ❃ ❋ [anchor=4][size=5]Do you like loud yelling? [columns][size=5]>> Yes << [spoiler=You should play...][icon=jarvan iv size=60][icon=garen size=60][icon=xin zhao size=60][/spoiler] [nextcol][size=5][goto=5]>> No <<[/goto][/columns] [size=5]❀ ❁ ❃ ❋ [anchor=10][size=5]Do you like attacking people when they can't attack back? [columns][size=5]>> Yes << [spoiler=You should play...][icon=nasus size=60][icon=fiora size=60][icon=warwick size=60][icon=jax size=60][/spoiler] [nextcol][size=5][goto=11]>> No <<[/goto][/columns] [size=5]❀ ❁ ❃ ❋ [anchor=17][size=5]Does your jungler constantly refuse to gank your lane? [columns][size=5]>> Yes << [spoiler=You should play...][icon=ezreal size=60][icon=ziggs size=60][icon=xerath size=60][/spoiler] [nextcol][size=5][goto=18]>> No <<[/goto][/columns] [size=5]❀ ❁ ❃ ❋ [anchor=23][size=5]Are we dictated by our own destiny? [columns][size=5][goto=24]>> Yes <<[/goto] [nextcol][size=5]>> No << [spoiler=You should play...][icon=twisted fate size=60][icon=jinx size=60][/spoiler][/columns] [size=5]❀ ❁ ❃ ❋ [anchor=26][size=5]Do you lack map awareness? [columns][size=5]>> Yes << [spoiler=You should play...][icon=shen size=60][icon=soraka size=60][/spoiler] [nextcol][size=5][goto=27]>> No <<[/goto][/columns] [size=5]❀ ❁ ❃ ❋ [anchor=28][size=5]Are stunning girls your currency? [columns][size=5]>> Yes << [spoiler=You should play...][icon=ashe size=60][icon=leona size=60][icon=irelia size=60][icon=riven size=60][icon=lissandra size=60][icon=sejuani size=60][/spoiler] [nextcol][size=5][goto=29]>> No <<[/goto][/columns] [size=5]❀ ❁ ❃ ❋ [anchor=11][size=5]Care for a root? [columns][size=5]>> Yes << [spoiler=You should play...][icon=morgana size=60][icon=lux size=60][icon=karma size=60][icon=swain size=60][icon=caitlyn size=60][icon=nautilus size=60][icon=rengar size=60][icon=varus size=60][/spoiler] [nextcol][size=5][goto=12]>> No <<[/goto][/columns] [size=5]❀ ❁ ❃ ❋ [anchor=18][size=5]Do you like squirrels and shit? [columns][size=5]>> Yes << [spoiler=You should play...][icon=amumu size=60][icon=corki size=60][icon=heimerdinger size=60][icon=kennen size=60][icon=lulu size=60][icon=rumble size=60][icon=veigar size=60][icon=twitch size=60][/spoiler] [nextcol][size=5][goto=19]>> No <<[/goto][/columns][/quote]

[quote=jhoijhoi]This took me like 5 hours, so the jokes got pretty stale by the end. But I hope you enjoy! ^^ Post the champion you got below, go play a game, and come back with a screenshot :3[/quote]

[quote=The_Nameless_Bard]How is [[Thresh]], who is clearly the BDSM support, not under torture? xD "What delightful agony we shall inflict." -[[Thresh]] Also, [[Bard]] has a skill called [[magical journey]] xD[/quote]

[quote=jhoijhoi]So the way I did this was through process of elimination. If you hit yes or no, the list of champions get split up. So the first question pertains to skill shots - if you say you do like skillshots, the only champions that follow from that thread are champions with skill shots, and if you say no, the only champions that follow from that thread are champions without skill shots. That means that champions eliminated in early stages can't reappear later on in other questions. As Thresh has a skillshot, he doesn't appear in the "no skill shot" thread, so therefore can't appear under the "bleed out" thread. If there are champions obviously missing from obvious jokes, that's the joke ^^[/quote]

[quote=utopus]This is brilliant[/quote]

[quote=Jimmydoggga 2.0]Is this intended to be cynical? I'm hoping it is.[/quote]

[quote=jhoijhoi]None of the above is serious :)[/quote]

[quote=Jimmydoggga 2.0]Yeah BTW nobody want to see Jayce or Yasuo in a wet T-Shirt.[/quote]

[quote=The_Nameless_Bard]What about the straight female/gay male/bisexual fan base? We deserve fan service too. [size=1]Though really I'd've liked to see some female champions there too.[/size][/quote]

[quote=FalseoGod][quote=Jimmydoggga 2.0]Yeah BTW nobody want to see Jayce or Yasuo in a wet T-Shirt.[/quote] You're wrong. About Jayce at least.[/quote]