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PSA: Vaccines!

Creator: Bioalchemist March 9, 2015 4:30pm
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Bioalchemist
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Hello everyone,

I am your local Biochemist with a service announcement regarding.....vaccines!



This announcement will discuss:

1) What are vaccines?

2) How do they work?

3) Does getting a flu vaccine prevent you from seasonal flu?

4) Does giving them to your babies give them autism?

5) Malaria coming back in Myanmar WTF?

____________________________________________________________________________________________

(1)

A vaccine is actually a 'dead' virus that has been put into a buffered solution. The buffered solution containing the 'dead' virus is injected into your bloodstream, captured by your immune system, tagged as a potential threat, and eaten by a natural killer cell. Why do I keep putting ticks around dead? A virus is more or less a strand of RNA or DNA wrapped in a delivery system similar to a drug (which is a chemical wrapped in a delivery system). A virus also can not replicate without the use of a living organism. Also, it is very difficult to determine the the virus has become completely inactivated due to the fact that it really is just a strand of genetic material surrounded by a protein system and all it takes is one intact system to infect you.

(2)

A vaccine works by providing your body with the ID of the virus. Think of it as having a blacklist at your local bar. When the bartender sees someone on the blacklist they immediately will refuse to serve them alcohol. This is similar to your body. It has antibodies that recognize the specific virus floating in circulation, when the antibody comes into contact with the virus it attaches and signals killer cells to consume it.

(3)

Does the flu vaccine prevent you from getting seasonal flu? The answer is not necessarily. Just like bacteria, which can mutate to prevent antibiotics from being effective (MRSA is a good example, SO TAKE YOUR FU*&^%@$ ANTIBIOTIC...YES AS PERSCRIBED...YES THE WHOLE FU*$%^&@ DOSE), a virus can also mutate into a different 'strain' which has properties that your immune system can not immediately recognize. So you could be safe from strain a thanks to your vaccine but not strain ab.

http://www.cdc.gov/flu/news/updated-vaccine-effectiveness-2014-15.htm

So I know you are thinking...should I get the flu shot? The answer is: up to you. If you are a healthy young adult you really should have no need to get it. Even if you do it is not necessarily going to keep you from getitng the flu though it may relieve symptoms. If you are very young say toddler age you should get it because it will help to develop your growing immune system. If you are past your prime you also should consider it as flu could actually kill you and the vaccine is at least a shot at preventing this with a very small chance of biting you in the ***.

(4)

Does giving your baby the usually perscribed vaccines give them autism? You should ask Jenny McCarthy.







Just kidding, though a lot of people latched onto her like a leech. There is no scientific proof that vaccines lead to autism.

http://cid.oxfordjournals.org/content/48/4/456.full

In summary, a paper got published stating that the findings of the research provide a direct correlation between MMR vaccine and autism. When further examined it was found that the experimental design was ****. There was no control. He simply identified a group of children that had a number of similar symptoms and attributed it to vaccines even though a much much much greater amount of children received the vaccine without developing autism. Obviously you can opt out of giving your children vaccines but if you choose to do so please home school them their entire lives and keep them in a bubble after that...I don't want my kid catching measles from your kid.

(5)

Malaria making a comeback? I thought we squashed that ****? The answer is yes. The Bill Gates foundation is centered around getting rid of this disease, but unfortunately as I stated before a virus can mutate making it difficult to destroy. The issue with Malaria in Myanmar is attributed to poor treatment through knockoff vaccines that are only 50% effective at killing the virus leading to mutation of the other 50% that are not killed and through watered down products that don't have the potency to be 100% effective which again leads to mutation but in this case makes it even worse because the vaccine known to be 100% effective now can't be used. Both cases arrive from China where making things cheap comes above all else.


___________________________________________________________________________________

Feel free to discuss your thoughts on vaccines below. Also remember that sharing needles is never recommended



Searz
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"I sexually Identify as an Attack Helicopter. Ever since I was a boy I dreamed of soaring over the oilfields dropping hot sticky loads on disgusting foreigners. People say to me that a person being a helicopter is Impossible and I’m ****ing ******ed but I don’t care, I’m beautiful. I’m having a plastic surgeon install rotary blades, 30 mm cannons and AMG-114 Hellfire missiles on my body. From now on I want you guys to call me “Apache” and respect my right to kill from above and kill needlessly. If you can’t accept me you’re a heliphobe and need to check your vehicle privilege. Thank you for being so understanding." - Guuse

"uh, I identify as counterstrike and I find this globally offensive" - ???
FalseoGod
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Did someone call for Sharon Needles?
Jimmydoggga 2.0
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sharing needles is never recommended


Don't tell me what to do m8.

Basically MOBAFire.
Bioalchemist
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^ not telling you what to do. just saying it isn't recommended. having unprotected sex is also not recommended but i bet you do that all the time don't you?

lol i like the calculus portion of that link searz

Thanks to jhoijhoi for my signature!

FalseoGod
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I trust my bf we are tested and we can't get pregger so we do yes ;_;
Thank you Byron for 2014's loudest laugh up till today
GrandmasterD
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I learnt nothing. Regarding vaccines, as Martha Steward would say: “It's a good thing”.
Bioalchemist
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FalseoGod wrote:
I trust my bf we are tested and we can't get pregger so we do yes ;_;


i knew it.

I learnt nothing. Regarding vaccines, as Martha Steward would say: “It's a good thing”.


i'm sorry i have failed you.

Thanks to jhoijhoi for my signature!

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i'm sorry i have failed you.


I think it is I who hasn't failed you.
Latest Legend
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Q: Why are vaccines such a hot topic at the moment?
********'s a pretty good fertilizer
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