****ing ELO Hell Singed carry guide. This is the REAL Singed guide for pwning noobs.
READ THE WHOLE ****ING THING. IT WILL BE ENTERTAINING AND HELPFUL.

Let's get started shall we?

I get magic pen marks for my OP poison trail.

Armour seals for taking **** from minions and living ganks.

Magic Resist per lvl glyphs because base armour is higher than MR. LIKE WTF MAN YOU CAN ACHIEVE A HIGHER AP AT THE END AND YET YOU HAVE LESS BASE MR. QQQQQQQQQQQQQQQ

I get flat armour and/or MR quints because I like to dive at ****ing lvl 3 and I need the right runes for this super aggressive playstyle. But in all seriousness it is for being able to take hits until lvl 6 where you're gonna go into god mode.

14 on defense and 16 on utility.

The main ones I want to talk about is the maximum mana and movement speed masteries.

Basically at the end game Singed will have an *** load of mana, that masteries gives him even more mana, and mana translates into health because of Singed's OP passive.

Movement Speed is the new ****ing OP and I can't afford movement speed runes and I doubt any of you cheap *******s would either.

I start with boots 3 health pots.

Then I get a philo stone.

I then get a catalyst and I will be untouchable in lane.

I get my lvl 2 boots. Tabi for heavy auto attackers, and Mercs for tenacity and MR.

I get my ROA(core item). It gives me AP along with an *** load of HP and MP. AND EVEN MORE HP AFTER HIS PASSIVE LOLOOLOLOLOL.

I get FON next. It has the most ****ing OP stat ever, movement speed.
At the end of the game, you'll regen faster than a ****ing mundo.
MR is always good, makes you ****ing tanky so you can 1v1 ****ing Brand mid(sarcasm).
I ****ing hate Banshee's Veil on Singed. Get it if you want, but I ****ing hate it on this champion.

I then get Frozen Heart.
IT'S ****ING OP ON SINGED.
The mana gives you more poison trail and HP because of his OP passive.
The armour is a ****ing OP amount, 99. Screw ****ing thronmail and his fancy*** 3 digit 100.
20% CDR. FLING THEIR *** AND OWN THEM. His ult imo already has too low of a cooldown with such a long duration and such usefulness. just too good.
Reduces AS of nearby enemies by 20%. THIS MAKES A FED SINGED BETTER THAN A FED AD CARRY. YOU CAN JUST JUST ZONE AND PISS OFF THEIR ENEMY AD CARRY SO THAT THEY WILL NEVER BE PART OF THE FIGHT. So Troll I swear to god.

Rylai's. Slow ****ing OP, gives you HP and makes your poison even more OP. (Don't wanna bore you guys)

If you build Tabi, make your philo stone into a Eleisa's Miracle for the tenacity. I doesn;t need to be this late.
I f you build Mercs, get a Shurelya's Reverie. IT"S NOT A ****ING SUPPORT ITEM. USE THE ACTIVE AND GHOST TO FLING THE ENEMY TEAM'S AD CARRY IN YOUR WHOLE TEAM AND PISS HIM OFF. ^_^

Prioritize R>Q>E>W , but take one point in W at lvl 4.

REAL MEN TAKE E BEFORE W SO THEY CAN DO TONS OF DMG IN THEIR LANE. YOU DON'T NEED W IN TEAMFIGHTS THAT EARLY, YOU NEED TO RAPE YOU R LANE SO HARD THAT THEY RAGEQUIT.

Teleport and Ghost.

Teleport to stay in lane and help your team for a far distance.

Ghost is ultimate juking/chasing spell. If a Singed has flash then he is a ****ing *****. Make sure to tell him that.

Just rape the ******* game and try to stall for late game.

Pros : You're OP

Cons : I have no ****ing idea, he's melee and you get called OP?

You ****ing initiate and OP FLING a squishy damage dealer on their team into your team. After, zone the support and other squishies away from the rest of your team until they cleaned up the rest of the team. then use W and Fling the rest of their team and ace their ***.

DON'T FLING TANKS WITH AOE ULTS INTO YOUR TEAM. AMUMU, GALIO, etc.....

You get E first since it is more useful in lvl 1 fights and you can fling idiots in to your tower, so auto attack farm lvl 1. When you get to lvl 2, get Q and try to farmthe minions with it. If your opponent does good early game dmg, try to farm safely until you get boots/philo stone/catalyst. After you get those items, start farming with your Q wuth ease, AND PUSH THE****ING LANE TO THEIR TOWER. YES, DO THAT. WHEN THEY COME TO GANK YOU, USE YOUR OP ULT AND RUN AWAY! Noobs can't farm under turret, so I always do this, if they can, i'll be more careful in lane since they actually know how to play their champion.

Respond to this **** PLEASE. I'M BEGGING YOU. Tell me the **** things about this guide and the awesome things. I swear if you do not carry games then your not doing something right. NOT MY FAULT. =P. Try it and get this guide viral. Thanks for reading this ****. Thanks all you trolls.