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Male gamer privilege?

Creator: The_Nameless_Bard December 4, 2014 9:49am
73 posts - page 4 of 8
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The_Nameless_Bard
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Permalink | Quote | PM | +Rep December 7, 2014 12:21pm | Report
Darcurse wrote:
But if you just had too many run-ins with problematic douches don't make it sound like all of the female (gamer) community has.
On the same note, just because you've seen a bunch of guys being nice to female gamers doesn't mean all guys are nice to them either. :P

I'm not saying "I've been harassed, therefore all female gamers have"; I'm saying "any benefits I personally might have received have not outweighed the harassment I also have received".
Darcurse
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Permalink | Quote | PM | +Rep December 7, 2014 2:40pm | Report
Noted.

But like I said, that doesn't mean it doesn't work the other way round.
And since we're talking about the female gamer community in general, you have to take everything into account.

For example, I know of 3 cases where the females were simply suffocated with kindness of a "normal" degree (not the total creepy type) and made no move to correct that or showed any sign they disliked it. Plus one totally needed it, lived for it, attention ***** through and through (and a *****).


It is a problem, that's a given, like so many other things in that regard and if you talk about this because you suffer from it personally, that's good.
But like already mentioned, you won't fix this problem here.
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Permalink | Quote | PM | +Rep December 7, 2014 2:42pm | Report
Could we maybe stop acting like it's her problem? And by we I actually mean you :P
********'s a pretty good fertilizer
The_Nameless_Bard
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Permalink | Quote | PM | +Rep December 7, 2014 2:53pm | Report
Darcurse wrote:
Noted.

But like I said, that doesn't mean it doesn't work the other way round.
And since we're talking about the female gamer community in general, you have to take everything into account.

For example, I know of 3 cases where the females were simply suffocated with kindness of a "normal" degree (not the total creepy type) and made no move to correct that or showed any sign they disliked it. Plus one totally needed it, lived for it, attention ***** through and through (and a *****).


It is a problem, that's a given, like so many other things in that regard and if you talk about this because you suffer from it personally, that's good.
But like already mentioned, you won't fix this problem here.
I won't let people treat me differently because I'm a woman. This really just means, for the most part, that I've opted out of these "benefits" you keep talking about and kept the harassment because the harassment isn't something I can control without refusing to let anyone know I'm a woman. Which is kind of the problem. You seem to be assuming I can force everyone to treat me equally, but in reality all I can do is stop people from suffocating me with "positive" attention I don't want. Which, by the way, often brands me as a ***** because I won't accept help I don't need.

Also, acting like you think these people you're talking about have never been harassed is pretty stupid as well. You may have never seen them get harassed or heard them complain about it, but I highly doubt they never have been because harassment is more common than a lot of people want to admit.

By pointing out that your statements are unfair, at best, I can at least hope to point out the problem. You seem to believe I can fix the way I am treated and I'm telling you that the harassment doesn't just go away because I say "you need to stop mistreating me because I'm a woman, I have just as much right to be here as you do".
Darcurse
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Permalink | Quote | PM | +Rep December 7, 2014 3:27pm | Report
I assume nothing here, I simply tell you that you can either let yourself get dragged down by it or not.

And I also never assumed that the 3 girls didn't face any harassment, on the contrary: They most certainly did. It's the fact that they decided NOT to let themselves get dragged down what's important here.

On the other hand you seem to assume that this case is kind of special. It's not.
In this day and age it simply catches the most attention.
It's the troublemaker himself who should be focused, not one single problem he causes.



Could we maybe stop acting like it's her problem? And by we I actually mean you :P

So if you open a thread and tell people about stuff that bugs you, it's not your problem?
You confuse me.
The_Nameless_Bard
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It is my problem, but I am not the only one who has to change how I act/feel to solve it. If I was it would have already been solved because I always make it clear that I want to be treated equally. The result of that is, as I already stated, that I don't receive a lot of extra positive attention for the most part, but the level of harassment I receive remains the same because I have no control over that.

I can pretend I'm not being harassed or that "I am not bothered by it" (which is effectively the same thing, no matter what words you want to use), but that also changes nothing and does not deal with the actual problem at hand. Quite the contrary, in fact, as it mostly makes the harasser believe their behavior isn't a problem.
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Permalink | Quote | PM | +Rep December 7, 2014 4:24pm | Report
Could we maybe stop acting like it's her problem? And by we I actually mean you :P

I understand what you meant, but that was pretty poorly worded :P
"Blizzard spoke thus; Thou shalt not BM. And the players replied Nay, I shall Play my hand with Lethal already on the board. And so Blizzard sent unto them this Brawl of Yogg, As a lesson for their sins of Pride and Greed, for he is the Prophet of Madness and RNG. On that day, the tavern descended into an era of chaos and darkness, until the weekend passed and everyone forgot all about it. Amen. Book of SMOrc, Verse 20, Chapter 4." - Feam T
Darcurse
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Permalink | Quote | PM | +Rep December 8, 2014 12:22pm | Report
Correct me if I'm wrong: What you want to tell me is that the strongarm method isn't what you're looking for because it doesn't resolve the problem?
You're bothered by this (which is definitely understandable, that's beyond debate) and we're talking about ways on how to tackle it, right?

If so I have to go back on a previous statement of mine:
Actively going against harassment in gaming isn't going to work.
The gaming scene isn't where the problem takes roots but only where it spreads to.
The_Nameless_Bard
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Permalink | Quote | PM | +Rep December 8, 2014 12:36pm | Report
At the same time, saying/doing nothing will definitely make sure nothing changes.
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Permalink | Quote | PM | +Rep December 9, 2014 9:46am | Report
That's for sure.

I only wanted to say, that you can't fix it by going directly against in-game harassment, you'd only cut of a single tree branch.
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