She got what she deserved >:[ :: League of Legends (LoL) Forum on MOBAFire

Show more awards

Posts:

5946

Joined:

Rep:

Profile Blog

Permalink | Quote | PM | | Report

So yesterday I got home early from work due to a company party. Low and behold the first thing my eyes beheld when I pulled up to my house was my cousin and her little 10 year old runt. I pretend to not see them as I got out of my car but was forced into a conversation when she walked over to me and waved her hand in front of my face with a loud "HEY".

Oh joyful was my heart when I heard these dreaded words poured out of her fat, gaping jaw with her little brat clenched in her hands "I'm going out and you owe me. Keep an eye on her for a few hours". Before I could utter an objection to her demands, a bag filled with her toys was in my hands and she made a mad dash towards her car, flooring it onto the road while knocking a poor driver into a head on head collision with a tree. I watched in awe only to have the moment ruined by a soft tug on my hand by a bright-eyed little girl with a :3 expression covering her face....... Perfect! >:[

So I sat her inside my house and threw her bag of toys at her and cracked open a book to salvage what I could of my extended evening. Not even 5 minutes in, she climbs up on my lap and sobs "I wanna pway with you Uncle Tosh!". I assured her that that wasn't in my job description and sent her on her merry little way. She then throws herself at my feet crying "but mommy said you'd pway with me and mommy wouldnt liiiiiiiiiiiieeeee!". 15 minutes later of crying and kicking my legs, I gave her exactly what she wanted.

She took out mlp toys.

She sets up her fruity dolls and says she wants to go on an adventure. She looks around and says "Ur the bad guy and we gonna stop you from ruining the booty (beauty) shop!". She then looks up at me with a smile and asks "You the baaaaaaaaad guy! Where's your toy so we can beat you uuuuuuuuuup?!" I reach down and pull up her discord toy. "Yeah we gonna beat ur butt up!" She exclaims as she starts to beat her toys together like an excited baboon. Before she collided her pony dolls into me and my toy, i hold up my hand to stop her "Wait up! We're all friends aren't we?". She stops to think a moment. "Nuh uh! You dissscurd! We're gonna stop you with our erements of hamini!" Right before she ran at me with all her dolls in hand, i reached into my pocket to pull a $20 dollar bill from my pocket. She stops and stares blankly at me. I ask "and whom might you be young lady?" She tells me "I'm wawity (rarity), the pootiest(prettiest) pony in aaall of equwestwia!"

I hand her the bill "Well it's your lucky day Rarity! You see, if you promise to make a friendship pact with me, I'll repay you back for the damages I did to your shop and more. All you have to do is take the bill and run". She held up the bill in her hands as she gazed down at the money, a smile slowly stretching across her face. She then jumped with joy as she dropped her other dolls and stomped around, hugging her Rarity doll and money. After the 10 minute outburst, I started to read again. She finally stopped and looked down, petrified with terror at the sight she beheld. In her celebration, she carelessly dropped her friends and stomped them into itty bitty pieces. She burst out into tears and screamed "WHY DID YOU DO THIS TOSHABIIIIIII? WHY DID YOU DO THIS TO MY FWENDS TOOOOOOOOOSH? WHYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY!?!". I quickly silenced her and sat her down by the pile of mangled pony corpses.

In her celebration of ill gotten gain, she abandoned her friends in the face of temptation and destroyed her only friends without even realizing it. Because of this, I won. I explained this to her and she just sat there silently on the mound of corpses for the remainder of the time. Her mom picked her up around 8 and i was able to enjoy the rest of my night in peace.

I got a phone call later on from the mom. "Why does my daughter want to buy a bag of cement saying 'imma do what the elements of harmony can no longer do'!?"

I think she'll be the death of me later on.

Tl;dr- Toshabi murders your toys too.

[quote=Toshabi]So yesterday I got home early from work due to a company party. Low and behold the first thing my eyes beheld when I pulled up to my house was my cousin and her little 10 year old runt. I pretend to not see them as I got out of my car but was forced into a conversation when she walked over to me and waved her hand in front of my face with a loud "HEY". Oh joyful was my heart when I heard these dreaded words poured out of her fat, gaping jaw with her little brat clenched in her hands "I'm going out and you owe me. Keep an eye on her for a few hours". Before I could utter an objection to her demands, a bag filled with her toys was in my hands and she made a mad dash towards her car, flooring it onto the road while knocking a poor driver into a head on head collision with a tree. I watched in awe only to have the moment ruined by a soft tug on my hand by a bright-eyed little girl with a :3 expression covering her face....... Perfect! >:[ So I sat her inside my house and threw her bag of toys at her and cracked open a book to salvage what I could of my extended evening. Not even 5 minutes in, she climbs up on my lap and sobs "I wanna pway with you Uncle Tosh!". I assured her that that wasn't in my job description and sent her on her merry little way. She then throws herself at my feet crying "but mommy said you'd pway with me and mommy wouldnt liiiiiiiiiiiieeeee!". 15 minutes later of crying and kicking my legs, I gave her exactly what she wanted. She took out mlp toys. She sets up her fruity dolls and says she wants to go on an adventure. She looks around and says "Ur the bad guy and we gonna stop you from ruining the booty (beauty) shop!". She then looks up at me with a smile and asks "You the baaaaaaaaad guy! Where's your toy so we can beat you uuuuuuuuuup?!" I reach down and pull up her discord toy. "Yeah we gonna beat ur butt up!" She exclaims as she starts to beat her toys together like an excited baboon. Before she collided her pony dolls into me and my toy, i hold up my hand to stop her "Wait up! We're all friends aren't we?". She stops to think a moment. "Nuh uh! You dissscurd! We're gonna stop you with our erements of hamini!" Right before she ran at me with all her dolls in hand, i reached into my pocket to pull a $20 dollar bill from my pocket. She stops and stares blankly at me. I ask "and whom might you be young lady?" She tells me "I'm wawity (rarity), the pootiest(prettiest) pony in aaall of equwestwia!" I hand her the bill "Well it's your lucky day Rarity! You see, if you promise to make a friendship pact with me, I'll repay you back for the damages I did to your shop and more. All you have to do is take the bill and run". She held up the bill in her hands as she gazed down at the money, a smile slowly stretching across her face. She then jumped with joy as she dropped her other dolls and stomped around, hugging her Rarity doll and money. After the 10 minute outburst, I started to read again. She finally stopped and looked down, petrified with terror at the sight she beheld. In her celebration, she carelessly dropped her friends and stomped them into itty bitty pieces. She burst out into tears and screamed "WHY DID YOU DO THIS TOSHABIIIIIII? WHY DID YOU DO THIS TO MY FWENDS TOOOOOOOOOSH? WHYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY!?!". I quickly silenced her and sat her down by the pile of mangled pony corpses. In her celebration of ill gotten gain, she abandoned her friends in the face of temptation and destroyed her only friends without even realizing it. Because of this, I won. I explained this to her and she just sat there silently on the mound of corpses for the remainder of the time. Her mom picked her up around 8 and i was able to enjoy the rest of my night in peace. I got a phone call later on from the mom. "Why does my daughter want to buy a bag of cement saying 'imma do what the elements of harmony can no longer do'!?" I think she'll be the death of me later on. Tl;dr- Toshabi murders your toys too.[/quote]