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The Fool's Adventures In Scrubdom

Creator: Foolamancer August 28, 2013 8:29am
Foolamancer
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Permalink | Quote | PM | +Rep October 2, 2013 6:03pm | Report
I'm noticing a very low gold count on all my games though. I think I need to start taking creeps from the lanes whenever I gank. I've been loath to do it thus far, because the idea of taxing just doesn't sit well with me, but honestly, I'm starting to think the jungler just needs the gold.
"Sometimes it is better to light a flamethrower than to curse the darkness."
- Terry Pratchett
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Permalink | Quote | PM | +Rep October 3, 2013 9:41am | Report

Bans were Nasus, Shen, Singed, Blitzcrank, Malphite, and Amumu.

I'm very proud of my performance this game. I gave it my standard start, and the enemy Wukong proved himself to be sort of an idiot when he Flashed immediately after I walked into lane, despite the fact that he was too far away for me to have even E-Q'd to him. He then came back in while I was still standing in the river bush, so that was an easy First Blood for Garen and some delicious farm for me as we pushed to the tower.

Me and Garen were best bros this game. This guy was awesome, and the two of us just continuously beat seven kinds of **** out of Wukong and Olaf throughout the laning phase, since neither of them ever bought so much as a single ward. Midlane was doing fine (and heavily warded) and bot was shoved to tower, so I just got Garen ridiculously fed.

But that isn't really how I carried this game (and I would argue that I actually did). Getting Garen fed was awesome, since the two of us could just bulldozer through the entire enemy team during teamfights, but what really won this was my superior objective control and shot-calling. This team was actually very good about coordinating so long as I actually told them where to go, which is what let us come back.

And I do mean come back, because, despite the fact that Garen and I were completely trashing Wukong during the early game, the other lanes were strictly even. Then, after a successful gank on Vayne and Sona, when I was taking a dragon, Garen decided to abandon his tower and come down to midlane, which gave Olaf the ability to splitpush freely.

This was the one point in the game where no one listened to me, and we paid dearly for it. We lost both the outer and inner top towers. Then, when we stacked up in mid to defend against their group push, Katarina had a client crash just as I initiated. It was pretty much a perfect initiation, and got the entire enemy team to burn everything (including Malzahar's ultimate) on me while keeping them all trapped in Cataclysm, but since Katarina couldn't follow up - again, she disconnected at the exact moment I pressed R - we lost the fight and everything in the midlane, including the inhibitor, before she reconnected. That was also Garen's only death.

However, that was my first death of the game, and both Garen and I were heavily fed at this point (I was 2/1/4, if I remember correctly). Katarina reconnected just after we lost the inhibitor, so we still had our full team, and, critically, I had the dragon timer. Olaf didn't.

And Wukong was still an idiot. We caught him out as he was splitpushing in the bottom lane, took the free kill, and snatched another dragon before falling back to defense. Even though they were smart enough to actually group up after that, I could Cataclysm Malzahar and Vayne every fight, and they simply didn't have the damage to take down Garen, particularly since they were burning every single ultimate on me. That's where all my deaths came from. They were very, very bad about just blasting every single skill they had on me after I initiated, which left Garen and Katarina free to just clean up.

We held out until the inhibitor respawned, caught out Wukong in our jungle thanks to my warding, killed him, and took two middle towers before disengaging for another dragon. I then went out to bottom lane to splitpush that outer tower down.

This was where probably the single best play I made this game happened. Sona, Vayne, and Malzahar all popped out in an attempt to stop me from taking the tower. I got it, and, knew that Garen was looping around in their jungle behind them, while Zyra had come up in the lane bush behind me and was lying in wait. I E-Q'd in, Cataclysmed all three of them, and Flashed out as Garen came spinning in and Zyra dropped Stranglethorns for an easy triple.

We took another free dragon. Then, as the rest of the team went back, I put a pink ward on the Baron pit, which lured their entire team out there to check that we weren't trying for it. When they saw that we weren't there, they tried to group up and crush through the midlane, but I was lurking in our blue buff and came in from the back with Garen in tow. The two of us immediately nuked down Malzahar and Vayne, then destroyed Wukong as well, and our team just pushed to win.

THINGS I SCREWED UP:

- I honestly can't really think of anything this game. Maybe a few of my initiations could have been a little cleaner, and I didn't need to die each time I went in, but since they were burning all their ultimates on me every time it worked out anyway.
"Sometimes it is better to light a flamethrower than to curse the darkness."
- Terry Pratchett
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Permalink | Quote | PM | +Rep October 3, 2013 9:44am | Report
odd bans and still no thresh picked? pity
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Permalink | Quote | PM | +Rep October 3, 2013 9:46am | Report
Quoted:

odd bans and still no thresh picked? pity


Yeah, I usually don't bother banning him because, as much as people in this level of play suck at dodging hooks, pretty much everybody who plays him just does it because he's open and has a reputation for being overpowered rather than because they can actually do anything with him.

On the other hand, champions like Nasus and Singed could be played effectively by a brain-damaged monkey on crack, and will be exceptionally annoying in every game. So there you go.
"Sometimes it is better to light a flamethrower than to curse the darkness."
- Terry Pratchett
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Bans were Vayne, Kassadin, Amumu, Fizz, Blitzcrank, and Master Yi.

This was just sad to watch. Apparently it was our Swain's last game in his promotion series to hit Silver, but, uh... he didn't do so hot, as you can see. Ahri was legendary before 15 minutes had passed. Jarvan IV fed First Blood to the enemy top lane, then died to Ahri and proceeded to try and blame Swain for it (which may have been correct, I wasn't watching).

Bottom lane was strictly even. Leona and I were butting heads a lot but nothing was accomplished either way until Ahri and Hecarim started roaming and orchestrating four-man dives on us, at which point it was basically game. The entire enemy team was fed out of their minds.

THINGS I SCREWED UP:

- I don't think I made any actual mistakes this game, mostly because by the time we got out of the laning phase the game was so over it wasn't even funny. But I did miss some hooks, and could probably have at least won this lane hard if I had practiced more with the support role. The game itself was lost and had nothing to do with me or Urgot, but we could have at least won that lane.
"Sometimes it is better to light a flamethrower than to curse the darkness."
- Terry Pratchett
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Permalink | Quote | PM | +Rep October 4, 2013 7:41am | Report

Bans were Nasus, Singed, Thresh, Shen, Malphite, and Amumu.

Vladimir didn't start with a ward, which was a pretty horrible idea when the enemy jungler is Jarvan IV and you're laning against Swain (yes, it was Swain top and Pantheon mid). The sheer amount of lockdown there is absurd, and we abused the hell out of it.

My first gank against Vladimir got both First Blood and his Flash. I followed it up with another easy kill, and then another, leaving me at 2/0/1 at less than six minutes. So I picked up an early Long Sword and some Mobility Boots.

I got mid and top snowballing very heavily very early on. Maokai accomplished nothing of note except one kill on Ashe. And, once I got mid snowballing, every lane was pretty much set due to Pantheon's global presence with Grand Skyfall. Once he got an early lead, the two of us just constantly ganked bottom with the man drop, and all of their lanes were entirely shut down.

That was pretty much it. We took two free dragons, red buffs, blue buffs, all the outer towers, without any answer from the enemy team. The only death I had was because we were pushing to win and I died during the final engage, but set up the ace with Cataclysm so we won on the spot.

THINGS I SCREWED UP:

- I don't think this was a mistake, as such, because honestly this game was very easy, but I could have been more aggressive about counterjungling Maokai. I still took two reds and a blue from him, but it could have been more if I had been willing to take more risks. I'm not sure whether or not I want to take those risks, but it's something I've been considering lately. I think I'm going to try playing some more Udyr in normals to practice effective counterjungling.
"Sometimes it is better to light a flamethrower than to curse the darkness."
- Terry Pratchett
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Permalink | Quote | PM | +Rep October 4, 2013 9:24am | Report

Bans were Thresh, Ahri, Zed, Vayne, Kassadin, and Blitzcrank.

Holy ****, this Fizz was so mad.

The game started out fine. I handed Darius First Blood against Shen and snatched up two more kills in the bottom lane, leaving me at 1/0/2 early on. But... yeesh.

Malzahar had no Flash, but Fizz didn't seem to have any idea of what he was doing. He died to some of the most obvious Heal/ Barrier baiting I have ever seen, multiple times, and ended up actually below me in CS for most of the game. Malzahar was, at the same time, warding super-heavily and never actually positioning all that aggressively. He just pushed the wave to the tower, let Fizz fail at farming, and killed him when Fizz finally snapped and tried to all-in. Fizz actually threatened to AFK at the ten-minute mark, but I convinced him to come back in.

Meanwhile, despite my early successful gank at the bottom lane, Caitlyn was feeding horrendously. As you can see from the kill count for this game, I was involved in literally every team our kill got except one, which was when Darius just walked across Shen backing in a bush after he narrowly escaped from an earlier fight, and didn't manage to kill him until the assist timer was down. So... yeah. Darius was fine, I guess, since he only really died outside of the laning phase, and Karma was fine, but both of our team's carries were worse than useless. We couldn't do anything.

THINGS I SCREWED UP:

- Wasting time attempting to gank for Fizz. This game seemed unwinnable, but I could have at least improved my own performance by not continuing to try and bring him back into the game when it was clearly hopeless.
"Sometimes it is better to light a flamethrower than to curse the darkness."
- Terry Pratchett
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Permalink | Quote | PM | +Rep October 4, 2013 10:31am | Report

GAAAAAAHHHHHH

Bans were Ahri, Shen, Twisted Fate, Blitzcrank, Kassadin, and Thresh.

This team. This team. It was so bad.

Master Yi invaded me at red but had no actual plan, so I just Smite-secured the buff (he didn't even pull it into the bushes) and strolled off. He did put enough damage down onto me that I wasn't able to gank immediately, though, so that was disappointing.

The only real mistake I made this game was when I spotted Master Yi trying to gank without red buff after I came back out of the base, which meant that his buff was still up. I mistimed the invade, though, and ended up surrendering First Blood when the enemy bottom lane came in to assist.

And, immediately after that, Twitch and Soraka died. They didn't bother retreating when all three of the enemies that had just killed me collapsed onto them. In fact, they pushed to tower, and didn't even retreat when all three of them ran over a ward.

Then Kha'Zix died in midlane. And Nasus died in top. And Nasus lost the top tower. And Master Yi took the bottom tower. And they took a dragon.

Honestly, the rest of the game can be summed up by looking at the scoreboard. I was determined that we weren't going to lose this one. Everyone on my team was determined that we were, particularly the hyper-toxic Twitch. I went full man mode and roamed around the map murdering everyone I could find, but it wasn't enough. I went and solo-took both of the towers that our team ended the game with. I solo-took the only dragon we got. I made sure that we even got a Baron.

But it wasn't enough. Everyone on this team was abysmal, except, sort of, Nasus, who was kind of just carried by the strength of the champion. I completely destroyed every single member of the enemy team. I was our teamfights. I murdered Master Yi. I crushed Zed. I destroyed Tristana. But I couldn't save this game.

THINGS I SCREWED UP:

- Holy **** that invade was dumb of me.
"Sometimes it is better to light a flamethrower than to curse the darkness."
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Permalink | Quote | PM | +Rep October 4, 2013 11:40am | Report

This was

the biggest throw

in the history of ever

I HATE MY TEAM

Bans were Singed, Amumu, Master Yi, Kassadin, Thresh, and Blitzcrank.

This started out well, despite the fact that our Kha'Zix gave up First Blood and tried to pin the blame on me. I counterganked Volibear successfully three times, stole his blue buff, got a free dragon... basically, we were golden. We had ALL OF THEIR OUTER TOWERS. They had ONE of ours.

But this team, man.

This team.

Morgana never once used her Zhonya's Hourglass active, except once when she was trying to place a ward. Kha'Zix never once actually hit anyone in a teamfight other than Volibear. Corki always chased said Volibear away from the fight and let the rest of their team win a 4v4. Fiddlesticks made the most ******ed engages of all time with Crowstorm and never once used his Zhonya's, either.

To give you an idea of how bad these guys were at teamfighting: we had Baron. All three enemy inhibitors were exposed. One was down. FIDDLE ULTS OVER THE WALL INTO VI'S FACE, EXPLODES, VI ULTS MORGANA, MORGANA ATTEMPTS TO FLASH OUT INSTEAD OF HITTING ZHONYA'S, CONTRIBUTES NOT SO MUCH AS A SINGLE AUTOATTACK TO THE FIGHT, CORKI IS OFF ****ING AROUND CHASING VOLIBEAR, AND I'M THE ONLY ONE ACTUALLY CONTRIBUTING ANYTHING TO THE FIGHT.

We got aced and lost on the spot.

And that wasn't even the worst of it. In earlier teamfights, when I landed a perfect four-man Cataclysm that locked up everyone but Nami on their team, we still lost because Morgana didn't do anything at all. And she then *****ed at me for not using my ultimate to peel. I LITERALLY KEPT THE ENTIRE ENEMY TEAM FROM MOVING FOR FIVE SECONDS. IS THAT NOT PEEL ENOUGH FOR YOU?

THINGS I SCREWED UP:

- I don't even know, man. Teamfights with this team were just so pathetic that I'm not sure whether or not changing anything I did would have won us the game. We had a huge lead, but all of these guys just sucked so bad at actually fighting that it didn't matter.
"Sometimes it is better to light a flamethrower than to curse the darkness."
- Terry Pratchett
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Permalink | Quote | PM | +Rep October 4, 2013 1:01pm | Report

Phew.

Bans were Kassadin, Zed, Thresh, Blitzcrank, Amumu, and Shen.

This game swung back and forth hugely, and it's left me kind of exhausted. At the beginning, everything was going smoothly. Their Hecarim was, to be blunt, pretty much trash at jungling. I walked all over him. He attempted a level 2 gank immediately after taking his blue buff, so he accomplished nothing and I got his red for free. I counterganked him at least eight times over the course of this match, and every time, he died or had to run away with about a hundred health. I basically just walked around his jungle and took whatever I wanted; at one point I E-Q'd into his red buff camp, hit him without expecting to, and actually killed him just from the combo damage alone. Free red buff!

We took the first few towers and dragons of the game. The only real thing that had me worried was their Zyra, who was getting very fed. I was pretty fed myself, but when teamfights rolled around, that actually worked against me. I rushed Black Cleaver instead of my usual tank items, but in my idiocy I continued to play as though I were monstrously tanky, so my initiations didn't go quite so well.

Honestly, I'm probably the reason the game was as close as it was. I tried to throw pretty hard with that teamfight idiocy. I should have been peeling instead of diving onto their backline, particularly since they had Malphite, Hecarim and Zyra for an utterly ridiculous wombo combo. If I hadn't been so cocky, this game would have ended a lot sooner and without nearly as much effort on our part.

Anyway. Because I was being an idiot, they evened out the score, and the midgame was an absolute slugfest. Zyra was a complete monster in teamfights, and none of us could survive long enough to get to her, but the rest of their team couldn't close it out.

We took inhibitors, they took inhibitors, we took towers, they took towers. What really turned the game around in our favor was Ahri landing an absolutely beautiful Charm onto Zyra just as they were about to take our newly-respawned inhibitor, which meant that their AP carry exploded before the fight even began. We aced them, took Baron, and snatched two inhibitors in the bargain.

The final fight of the game took place in the Baron pit where, to my eternal shame, I missed my Smite and let Hecarim take the buff for his team. But we beat them anyway in the ensuing brawl ( Caitlyn was too far away to properly follow up) and pushed for the win.

THINGS I SCREWED UP:

- Honestly, I just got far too cocky this game, and my death counter shows it. I feel like an idiot, and I'm just glad that I was able to stop acting like a total jackass before the game was over.
"Sometimes it is better to light a flamethrower than to curse the darkness."
- Terry Pratchett

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