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Toshabi's Chamber of Critique

Creator: Toshabi December 15, 2014 10:07am
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Electro522
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This was my first signature ever made. What do you think?
Thank you jhoijhoi for the sig!
Jovy
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Permalink | Quote | PM | +Rep December 15, 2014 11:05am | Report
Hi!

Toshabi
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Electro522 wrote:
This was my first signature ever made. What do you think?




Definitely not a bad start at all and welcome to the tedious world of signature making and design.


Let's get started.

What I do like is the color choices certainly complement one another. Having blue be the accent color was a well made choice considering your intended color palette.


In the middle, I feel as though a better font choice could've been used here. In fact, I'm never usually a fan of cursive typefaces simply because it's very easy for readers to confuse the text. At first glance, I read it as "The DAMN will never rise again". Cursive font is rather difficult to pull off in some design and it requires some very keen design choices to be implemented first for its success. I recommend sticking with San Serif typfaces for now as you ease into the world of typography.


On the low end, there are two things I want to discuss here. The first being the background. I'm very happy you're keeping your colors consistent, but the background is simply too boring. I know simplicity in some cases does a lot, but a solid for a background just doesn't cut it for this design. What's especially ironic is the quote choice that goes with the background color. Here, we have Diana, feared ruler of the night telling her lowly victims that the sun will never rise again, and yet the background color is a warm color. This in hand with the plain background really hurts the design over all and it sends a mixed message with the quote you're using.

Secondly, the position of diana just isn't good at all. The poor girl is toppling over like a stone statue! I feel as though you should look into definitely straitening her out. Even if it means losing the majority of the blade, the impact of the message would come across stronger with her walking towards us menacingly as well as if we were to have a background comprised of more cool colors.


Not a bad first attempt at all, but you got some homework to do.


Also, is that your own artwork I see there?
Electro522
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The original did have a white background, making it difficult to give it a background. I agree with you, it needs more in it, but I couldn't figure out what could go with it. If I had an idea, implementing it was extremely difficult.

As for the tilt, I did want to capture the majority of the blade, but the original did have it pointing more towards the ground. I couldn't figure out how to zoom put in order to keep from decapitating her, but also keeping the blade I tact (can you see how new I am at this?). Thus, I was forced to tilt it to such an odd angle.

And no, this is not my artwork. I can hardly draw stick figures. I can dig up the original if you want me to. Or, just look up Blood Moon Diana on Google Images.
Thank you Toshabi for the advice!
IPodPulse
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Toshabi wrote:


Spoiler: Click to view



Thanks for the review, I think this is definitely one of my better signatures, the colors fit so well the the stock image and I was exploring good ways to blend images into backgrounds, this was a success in my opinion.

I didn't really think about the lens flare on the top right too much, that is a great observation you made and something I will definitely look at the next time I try something like this.

I agree with the cropping of the image, I definitely could of scaled it better to show more of Ashe, I also had some trouble blending in Ashe when in came to her chest, unlike the rest of her body the chest doesn't seem to blend in so well, I realize I could of simply added a small white overlay layer on top of it to fix it but what is done is done.

Thanks for the critique.
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Do u liek talkin liek dis? Well so does Janitsu! So check out Junatsee~'s Graphics for some awesome signatures!
Toshabi
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Quoted:
Hi!



Salutations! Hi! Hello! Good Afternoon!



Let's begin.


Looking back and forth at the original, I gotto say, I love what you did here. You turned a cool color palette into a warm one. Not only did you just change the lighting of the source, but you influenced every aspect of this picture to reflect the color changes. It allows you to get a better and fresh new opinion on the subject in general and it creates a very different mood/impression which is something I like. The focus of this picture is excellent with the crop job you did. The essentials of the body have been captured as well as enough of the object of her attention. The top and bottom borders are the icing on the cake of this picture and they accent and complement the entirety of this picture to a T.


In the middle, my one main gripe is the negative space that was inadvertently created from the cropping. Looking at the original, this space didn't exist given the vast span of the canvas. If you take a look at the space above her arm in the middle, this space just feels lacking and in want of something in there. Perhaps you can manipulate the clothe of Janna's outfit to blow a little in the front to add some movement in that area. It would effectively guide the eye's of the viewer to the object of Janna's interest (her staff). There is a small cloud that's sort of doing this job, however, it's not enough to fill the void. In fact, maybe even lightening that one cloud would offer some sort of satisfaction to that space as a whole. It's something you'll have to play around with.


The last thing I'd wanna nit pick is the very small patch of blue located here.


That one small spot, in my opinion, throws off the color balance of the subject overall and can be a bit distracting to the /thorough/ eye. It won't harm the subject over all to the passerbyer, but for someone like me, it's noticeable. I'd recommend going over it with an overlay with a slight orange brush ever-so-lightly. It's possibly that spot was just left out when the hue was altered.




Overall, it's a very well put together piece. I hope the suggestions I've made will help to fine tune your work.
Toshabi
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Electro522 wrote:
The original did have a white background, making it difficult to give it a background. I agree with you, it needs more in it, but I couldn't figure out what could go with it. If I had an idea, implementing it was extremely difficult.


See select tools: http://designshack.net/articles/software/8-ways-to-get-the-selection-you-want-in-photoshop/

With a white background, this should be able to achieve successfully with the tools discussed in that article.


Electro522 wrote:

As for the tilt, I did want to capture the majority of the blade, but the original did have it pointing more towards the ground. I couldn't figure out how to zoom put in order to keep from decapitating her, but also keeping the blade I tact (can you see how new I am at this?). Thus, I was forced to tilt it to such an odd angle.

And no, this is not my artwork. I can hardly draw stick figures. I can dig up the original if you want me to. Or, just look up Blood Moon Diana on Google Images.


That's the problem with using stock photography/images: You have to work with what you have. Honestly, you're just going to have to cut your loses with this picture. That or what could be done is simply resizing her to be a bit more small and playing around with textures/typography to get off a more powerful message. Sometimes, the subject is the icing on the cake and the text is the base on which the signature stands on. Typography is a powerful tool and it shouldn't be looked at lightly.




IPodPulse wrote:



Thanks for the review, I think this is definitely one of my better signatures, the colors fit so well the the stock image and I was exploring good ways to blend images into backgrounds, this was a success in my opinion.

I didn't really think about the lens flare on the top right too much, that is a great observation you made and something I will definitely look at the next time I try something like this.

I agree with the cropping of the image, I definitely could of scaled it better to show more of Ashe, I also had some trouble blending in Ashe when in came to her chest, unlike the rest of her body the chest doesn't seem to blend in so well, I realize I could of simply added a small white overlay layer on top of it to fix it but what is done is done.

Thanks for the critique.


You could always add in some grunge as well to help with blending. It's one of the very rare and few times where I'd suggest grunge (simply because it's just as overused as smolder expressions). In the end, it's going to result in much smudging (not soften).


And this definitely was a successful project for you.
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Emi
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Oooh I really like this idea! Me next :3 It's meant to be a wallpaper, so opening it in a new tab will zoom it in a little :D

Thanks to Janitsu for the sig!
Toshabi
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Quoted:
Oooh I really like this idea! Me next :3 It's meant to be a wallpaper, so opening it in a new tab will zoom it in a little :D




So right away, I want to say that I love the lines the most in this picture (off to the left and bottom). It's a simple design choice like that that makes the biggest impact at times. The positioning of the subject is also great for this wallpaper.


One thing I didn't notice that I should've is the bars running across the top and bottom of this picture. I've got to say, for signatures this works, but for desktop backgrounds, this doesn't always work. The reason for this is that those boarders are meant to aid in contrast to the website background. Given the resolution of this picture, there is nothing to contrast with, so they're sort of a wasted element. This is why I didn't even notice them at first.


Lastly, I want to say that the font color just isn't doing it for me. With font, you want it to contrast with the background. Given the size of the font you chose and the overall color of the subject, choosing blue/violet wasn't the best choice. I believe it would benefit you to read up a bit on complementary colors a bit. Or you can always go with white!

Additionally, cursive fonts are always trouble due to decreased readability. I believe that a better font choice could've been picked here (possibly Garamond, given that the "I'll give you a 5 minute head start" is sub text). Additionally, there should be a space in "head start". I would recommend rearranging the font positioning on this. In fact, you might just want to move the sub text line of "I'll give you [...]" to the bottom right of the page. I feel like the impact of it all will be much stronger like that. A set up like that might even work with the cursive font, but I still feel as though a serif typeface would benefit the overall design much better.


One more thing to note, but do be more mindful of your kerning. Most of the type in this (as well as just about everyone else in here) has ignored kerning. The bigger size the font is, the more essential it is to kern your work. Kerning makes a world of difference in overall presentation. Anything font size 18+ SHOULD be Kerned.


So things to consider:

- Different font colors that don't blend with the background
- Reconsider top and bottom borders
- Reconsider typeface choices for the sub text, preferably a Serif typeface.



And that's just how Toshabi sees it. If you would like to see these demonstrated (I know this one critique might be hard to follow without examples), send me over the .psd file and I'll show you some possible design routes in photoshop in regards to the text.
jhoijhoi wrote:

Also, I think the levels of immorality in this thread are astounding. You'd really throw a child off a boat for your own luggage? Wow.





Emi
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Thanks so much for the critique! +Rep'd ^_^

I guess I see what you mean about the borders. I think I'll just leave them there though, primarily cause I'm too lazy to take them out. Also, I'm not quite certain I understand how to utilize the complementary colors and the overall concept just isn't clicking with me :/ What color would go with what and how exactly do they contrast? I tried doing the complement of the light purple with a dark yellow, but that clashed and didn't look very good, so I'm assuming that's not what you meant xD

I actually kind of liked the cursive. I feel like it matches the taunty/sing-song attitude Caitlyn's expression has. I think I'd really like to try your suggestion of the text being at the bottom right hand, but I'm not quite sure exactly where you're talking about. I'll try and find a way to send the psd file, or if you have any suggestions of how to do it, I'll gladly listen.

Finally, how do you do kerning? I have actually never even heard of it until now, haha. Is there like a specific button or something? (I use Photoshop CC).
Thanks to Ubnoxius for the sig!
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