jhoijhoi's review & discussion service

[quote=jhoijhoi]You know what, my contract ends this Friday, and I haven't got any other work lined up yet, so I will catch up on these requests :) I'll be working backwards from here ^^[/quote]

[quote=Emi]In that case, could you drop by my Morgana guide and leave a review? It's pretty lengthy, so take your time :) Name: Emikadon Link: http://www.mobafire.com/league-of-legends/build/the-tormented-protector-372317 Read Making a Guide? Yep Spellcheck? Yep[/quote]

[quote=jhoijhoi]Will get on these next week. My contract was unexpectedly extended and now I'm teaching year 9 science (radioisotope super heroes), year 10 science (water rockets) and year 12 pre-vocational math (area, volume, scale).[/quote]

[quote=utopus]Edited because i forgot to follow your review template - sorry about that. Name: utopus Link: [url=http://www.mobafire.com/league-of-legends/build/support-morgana-who-burnt-my-cookies-387542]My morgana support guide[/url] Read your making a guide guide: Yes Spellchecked: yes An important note: In my guide, I have a very unusual itemization path when snowballing: [[zhonya's hourglass]] -> [[rod of ages]]. I've tested this itemization thoroughly with normal games, and some plat i/diamond 5 ranked games. With the exception of one game, I have won every game in the past 3 months when I have itemized this way. I have defended my reasoning with logic, and screenshots of my success, but people still disagree with my itemization. I know the way I play [[morgana]] support is different than most other people, and I really want to walk my readers through [b]my[/b] way of playing [[morgana]]. [u]I'd like to hear your thoughts on what I could do to better sell my readers on this idea[/u]. Should I do a mathematical proof? Should I upload videos of me snowballing with [[rod of ages]], instead of pictures? I'm getting the feeling like no matter how much I try to support this kind of thing through tangible evidence, people just keep on disagreeing. Thanks again for your time[/quote]

[quote=OTGBionicArm]Name: OTGBionicArm Link: http://www.mobafire.com/league-of-legends/build/jayce-complete-guide-to-a-brighter-tomorrow-393778 Did you read my Guide to Making a Guide just now? yes Have you run your guide through a spell check? yes[/quote]

[quote=jhoijhoi][columns] [nextcol width=100][color=#0080ff][b]NAME[/b][/color] -------------------------------- utopus [nextcol width=30] [nextcol width=100][color=#ff8000][b]CHAMPION[/b][/color] -------------------------------- [url=http://www.mobafire.com/league-of-legends/build/support-morgana-who-burnt-my-cookies-387542]SR Support Morgana[/url] [nextcol width=30] [nextcol width=100][color=#0080ff][b]RATING[/b][/color] ------------------------------- [color=#008000]7/10[/color] [nextcol width=30] [nextcol width=100][color=#ff8000][b]DATE[/b][/color] --------------------------- 13/09/14 [/columns] [spoiler=utopus' Support Morgana Guide Review] As per your request for a review [url=http://www.mobafire.com/league-of-legends/forum/build-and-guide-discussion/will-review-for-food-i-will-read-your-guide-6053]here[/url] :) Remember that I review as I read; this means some of my cheat sheet comments will not be applicable if you answer questions in the guide itself. [b]CHEAT SHEET[/b] ----------------------- + Summoner's look fine, however personally as support Morgana I like to grab [[exhaust]]. This is purely because I make terrible aggressive plays a support and prefer the fall back of Exhaust to protect my carry if things go wrong. + Hmm, I'm looking at your runes. I like the mix of flat and scaling magic resist. What I'm not sure about is the rest. I run Movement Speed quints on my supports in addition to Mob Boots. On Morgana, who often initiates fights, or has to be in the middle of everything, I see Movement Speed to be very valuable on her. + I personally start with one extra ward for lane brush. + "Other Desirable Items to Purchase" doesn't really explain to me which I should pick and when. + I grab a level in [[tormented soil]] to harrass at level 2 or 3 and get Spellthief gold. + Ah, I see how your runes and masteries synergise. You don't get movement speed quints because you grab all movement speed in utility; likewise you grab health and extra armour via runes because you don't go far down the defense tree ^^ + ? Don't waste Flash to get away from Blitz. Shield yourself after the grab to negate the knock up and engage on Blitz and the ADC. You can turn the fight around by taking advantage. I've baited plenty of Blitz's, got hooked and then just ulted so my ADC destroys. + [b]GUIDE[/b] -------------------- + I personally don't like Nick's template. Especially as you seem to be using the old column version, which means misalignments occur. + You clearly haven't spell-checked your guide. I can't take you seriously if you don't use capitalisation. does it look good if i dont use caps or If i use it Inappropriately with no punctuation I won't point out any spelling mistakes or typos, as a spell check will bring these up. + " Tormented Soil Acts as a weak, yet still effective wave pusher" > how is it weak? At level 2/3 it can clear waves easily - you don't have to combo anything, just lay it on the floor. Granted, you probably aren't levelling this ability up bottom lane. + Pros/cons look awkward. I think you need to change the size of the "+"/"-" text, or widen the column. + " this spell reveals invisible units" > doesn't reveal, just becomes activatable, meaning you can tell there's someone nearby. I would also add that many players will panic when ulted by Morgana and waste summoner spells trying to get away. Baiting their summoners can make a jungle gank successful straight after. + I still disagree with grabbing Tormented Soil so late. Even as a brush-checker it has more utility early game. While I agree that TS can push the lane, I think the trade off of extended damage and gold gen balances it. With regards to mana, I just noticed you don't ever mention getting [[chalice of harmony]] earlyish. + RoA: I think there may be a small misunderstanding here, either on my behalf or yours. You mention that Catalyst offers more benefits than Catalyst - unfortunately I don't think you can count on it like that. Realistically you won't be getting the Catalyst level-up bonus by the time you buy it. However, Morgana scales off AP, so... It requires 10 minutes for the item to charge to full potential, so I guess if you buy it early... ? + Personally I prefer Frozen Heart over Randuin's. Both work well in close combat, but I find I need/want the cooldown reduction. + I think your images should be bigger. Don't worry about "wasted space". + I'm surprised there was no mention of using Soul Shackles first to slow opponents, burn their escapes and [i]then[/i] cast Dark Binding for the kill. [b]READABILITY (2/3)[/b] ---------------------- + I enjoyed reading this but I feel that the guide layout distracts from the overall readability of the guide. In addition I was distracted by grammar mistakes and typos; these sort of indicate that you haven't taken the time to really read over your guide. Images should be larger for better comprehension. [b]CONTENT (2/3)[/b] ----------------------- + I feel like the content was well written, but still lacking some specifics. I realise this is a support Morgana guide, but I'd still expect mentions of combos consisting of using Black Shield on yourself to Flash + ult the enemy team (unless I missed this somewhere?). I'm not sure what more content you can add beyond some mention of helping your ADC last hit (may be boring to write). Just little things that you do to win games; where is the best place to pink ward? Where do you often Sweep? Do you ever take Blue Buff? The addition of videos is great and I think these will help players. It would be good to have a few gifs of successful snares to add to your ability section. [b]VIABILITY 3/4[/b] ------------------------ + I see the purpose behind your runes and masteries, but I question your skilling order and I'm still not quite swayed by your argument of RoA. I think your item progression in the cheat sheet could be a little bit better organised for people who only check cheat sheets. Everything else on the cheat sheet was fine and throughout the guide too. [b]TOTAL = 7/10[/b] ------------------------ + I believe a new player to Morgana will come away with a lot of knowledge from reading your guide. There are tips and tricks there that will help improve their gameplay, especially as an aggressive support. As a player of Morgana myself, and having written a guide for her and all, I didn't really learn anything new (except your tip to chuck a Binding into the jungle for extra HP - I'll start doing this). This is to be expected; I've played Morgana quite a lot, I didn't expect to learn something hidden :P I think the guide is lacking in the "support" department, such as warding, sweeping - vision in general, I guess; this can easily be amended. Alternative runes should be discussed. I think with the above changes and possibly some mathamancy to support your RoA argument, this guide could earn a scout point from me. Upvoted, good guide! :) <3 jhoijhoi[/spoiler] [columns] [nextcol width=100][color=#0080ff][b]NAME[/b][/color] -------------------------------- Emikadon [nextcol width=30] [nextcol width=100][color=#ff8000][b]CHAMPION[/b][/color] -------------------------------- [url=http://www.mobafire.com/league-of-legends/build/the-tormented-protector-372317]SR Support Morgana[/url] [nextcol width=30] [nextcol width=100][color=#0080ff][b]RATING[/b][/color] ------------------------------- [color=#008000]7/10[/color] [nextcol width=30] [nextcol width=100][color=#ff8000][b]DATE[/b][/color] --------------------------- 14/09/14 [/columns] [spoiler=Emikadon's Support Morgana Guide Review] As per your request for a review [url=http://www.mobafire.com/league-of-legends/forum/build-and-guide-discussion/will-review-for-food-i-will-read-your-guide-6053]here[/url] :) Remember that I review as I read; this means some of my cheat sheet comments will not be applicable if you answer questions in the guide itself. [b]CHEAT SHEET[/b] ----------------------- + I think your runes are very simple and standard; how do you feel about mixed magic resist? + Summoner spells are what I run on support Morgana. + In solo queue I'd personally pick up a ward over extra pots as my ADC may not use his totem to ward when mine dies out. Additionally, as I get Tormented Soil early, I heal passively off that. + The wording for "First Buy" is confusing. Get Sightstone, but swap Warding Totem as soon as you do? However, if you don't have enough gold (for what?) upgrade Spellthief? + I think your "Core Items" should have [[ruby sightstone]]. + I wouldn't display other boots than Mobs, and I'd have them displayed in "Core". + Totally forgot about Ardent Censer! Though I wonder if it's appropriate on Morgana, so often when you're shielding someone, they're trying to get away (unless they're initiating or fighting, I guess). + Why don't you mention [[frozen heart]] as an alternative Tank Choice? + Your final example build has 5 activate items, not including Sweeping Lens. + I think your skilling order is appropriate for a support Morgana. I'm glad you pick up TS early. + I don't think you should say "max E first", as the snare duration of Q is important; maybe something like "level it evenly with Q"? + Oooh, trade off between 9 in offense or 9 in defense... I like your set up, as the more AP Morg has, the more she spell vamps, so if you're spamming abilities, it might make up for not having defense masteries. [b]GUIDE[/b] -------------------- Introduction + I don't like your explanation of supports, "skill sets that are useful for their teams". This section should be heavily reworded. + I'd replace "Other Guides" with "Who am I" and tell the reader a bit about yourself. + Formatting is a little wonky here. Try using tables and vertical align top. + As Astrolia said, Lore should be in "Extra Reading". Additionally, I think Extra Reading should be at the end of your guide. Pros & Cons + Instead of "2 stuns/slows", I think something with the words "CC" should be used + I feel like this section should be rewritten to be relevant to bot lane, and not about Morgana herself. That's just personal opinion. + Use wikicoding when discussing her abilities, instead of just saying "her shield". + "Outside heal" makes no sense. + "No mobility" is incorrect. Summoner Spells + Colour change of font? + "renders [i]enemy[/i] adc useless" + I think you waffle a lot. Try and be a bit more consise. For example, "Exhaust is a typical pick for a support as it can shut down an enemy champion for 2.5 seconds, secure kills with its slow and protect your ADC in early game lane skirmishes." + Explanation for Heal is a bit over the place and can be written better. + I'd swap around the two reasons for getting Ignite, as the healing debuff is most important. Runes + As Astrolia said, redundant to have the [[[rune]]] code followed by the same images. Also, not sure about the sudden centered text? + [s]List alternative runes.[/s] + Maybe talk about how the armour runes scale throughout the game with health. + I think a better way to display this information is to have a really short summary (like "+ 72 HP) under each image, and then have a paragraph outside of the columns that explains the overall effect of the rune page. + I don't think alternative runes should be spoilered. I think explaining each rune type's choice together is better, as the reader will be able to get a better understanding of which rune to pick due to the comparisons. + I'd list the name of each rune, as most runes share the same graphic, new players can get confused. + You've got some broken code in the Move Speed description. Masteries + [[Expose weakness]] is also useful with everyone of Morgana's offensive abilities. Personally I'd grab it for the extra damage bot lane when I land a snare or zone with TS. + I'd mention that Morg spell vamps more with more AP, hence [[mental force]]. + Copy pasta "Lulu's mana problems" + I think only the first alternative is acceptable on Morgana. The other two are really situational. Skills + Not sure why you've changed the font size? + Not sure why you've listed easily accessible tool tip information? + You can Soul Siphon off champions and neutral minions too. + [[tormented soil]] can "check" brush via Spellthief ticks. + I only just realised it said "things to note" and not "drawbacks". I think the red text makes me think each point is a negative. Skill Sequence + "hurts a lot with AP backing it up" Items + You don't mention biscuit. Laning + "a couple of autoattacks is not getting bursted down" + Repetitive "as well" "as well" + Warding image should be larger Special Thanks + You don't actually thank anyone? In this section I think you should link your other guides and thank people who have helped you. This area would be appropriate for a reference list too. [b]READABILITY (2/3)[/b] ---------------------- + The guide is easy to read and I felt you were enthusiastic enough writing the guide (though towards the end your enthusiasm started to wane). However, for some reason, I didn't feel that the guide was written by a "professional". I am not sure why. Maybe it was because of the redundancy/waffling? I think if you go back over your guide and prune it down, cut out anything that's mentioned over and over again, it'll be a better guide. There were some typos and weirdly-worded sentences, but I think I picked up most of them. Coding-wise, I think that formatting was used well, but some aspects can be changed, as per suggestions above. Additionally, you seemed to have a strong theme set up in the introduction (blue text, rules) that you didn't carry through the rest of the guide; I think the guide would be more cohesive if you made some colour and structure changes. Aesthetically, I liked the graphics within the guide :) However, I definitely think any videos or game images should be enlargened for better comprehension. [b]CONTENT (2/3)[/b] ----------------------- + I liked what you did put into your guide, such as the extra reading section, but the articles are sort of meh. Instead, I'd personally take the [i]important[/i] bits and pieces from each article and add them to your guide, referencing the article, like an academic essay (you'd need a reference list at the end). This way all the GOOD stuff from the articles are present in your guide, without bogging down the reader with a bunch of articles filled with fluff. In terms of your other chapters, I felt like you perhaps had a working knowledge of the champion, but not a very in-depth one. You didn't seem to make connections to things that seemed obvious and some comments seemed tacked on. If you go ahead and start adding references to your guide, I think this problem would be resolved and your guide would be [i]deeper[/i] because of it. I did like how you compared items; I think this would help a new player. I actually didn't read every match-up and I think that's a shame, as I believe you shine here. Personally I'd go and dismantle the match-up section and add those tidbits throughout the guide as flavour instead of restricting it to just one section that's hidden by spoilers. I don't like spoilers in general in guides - if it's in the guide, it should be read, so what's the point of a spoiler? [b]VIABILITY 3/4[/b] ------------------------ + Your cheat sheet is pretty standard, and as above, I think there can be a few changes made (my personal preference, of course). The skilling order is great and the masteries look good to me. In terms of viability, I'd think a person could run your cheat sheet and do well, assuming they knew how to play LoL. Additionally, the content in the guide aides the reader in their understanding of Moragana and support play. I'm not too sure about a final build with 6 active items though. [b]TOTAL = 7/10[/b] ------------------------ + All in all, this guide is a decent read. Some waffle and some missed connections contribute to why this guide wasn't rated higher. I think it's a good guide for new players to Morgana. I do feel that more mention should be made to support Morg in particular. For instance, you don't actually mention much about warding and Sweeping, or taking/securing objectives such as Dragon/Baron. These things are pretty important during the game. Upvoted, good guide! :) <3 jhoijhoi[/spoiler] If I had to pick between utopus' guide and Emi's, it'd really depend on the target audience, as each guide is strong for different reasons. Emi's is more noob-friendly, but utopus' guide is far more mechanically-minded. I would recommend reading Emi's to get an idea of Morg as a starting point, and then moving onto utopus' for a more thorough exploration of support Morgana and neat tips/tricks to hone your gameplay. (I'd liken the transition as moving on from the final year of primary into the first year of secondary school - you need all the basics and foundations from primary school in order to understand secondary)[/quote]

[quote=utopus]Thanks for the review, Jai - It means a lot to me :) 3x +rep; Your attention to detail, and willingness to read each guide with an open mindset is unique, and quite helpful - You were able to spot flaws in my guide that many other people overlooked; I'll be sure to make some changes, and add a little more explanation to things I did not cover thoroughly. I'll be sure to grammar check my guide more thoroughly this time before requesting another review from you; Google Docs corrected most of the spelling, but there were a lot of run-ons in my guide, which I didn't really notice before EDIT: congrats on 1800 rep!!!!! Almost at 2000![/quote]

[quote=jhoijhoi]No worries :3 I'm glad you found the review useful. Will definitely come back for a rereview when you're ready. For now, please accept this signature; you don't have to use it, but I thought it was the least I could do for the person who finally got me to 1800 :P <3 [center][IMG]http://i1106.photobucket.com/albums/h380/thejhoijhoi/utopus.png[/IMG][/center][/quote]

[quote=NorthernRedStar]Not sure about your schedule, but please feel free to review the others before me. I am soft-remaking my guide within a week, so it'd be a bit out of place. Cheers.[/quote]

[quote=jhoijhoi]Hi Northern ^^ I've just been reviewing randomly. If you've been on the list for a while, I apologise. I'm sort of working my way backwards, so by the time I get to yours, it'll probably be after your soft-remake. Feel free to post here again to notify me of the rework, so I can get yours done ASAP. Thanks for being patient :)[/quote]