How to play support in season 4

By request of PsiGuard, here is my season 4 support guide.
Note: I've played approximately one game in S4. (As AD carry bruiser assassin enforcer fighter tank counter jungler J4.) [In other words, this is roughly 99% sarcastic.]
STEP 1: Pick a strong duo lane consisting of characters who don't suck complete *** early game (any combo of melee/bruisers/CC bots). It doesn't matter which character you decide to "support" as. Do you want to play something like Darius and Pantheon or Zed and Riven in a lane? Go ahead.
STEP 2: If you have an actual ranged AD carry, send them mid to mindlessly farm and push towers. If the enemy team is running 2-1-2, and the 2 duo laners are strong early game CC bot tank melee assassin bruisers, your AD carry will more than likely get dunked to the heavens and back, so mid is now a nice comfy lane for them to chill in. (Unless mid is also a duo lane.)
STEP 3: Holy ****, this is the most important part. Are you ready for this ****? Start with a Relic Shield…
Note: I've played approximately one game in S4. (As AD carry bruiser assassin enforcer fighter tank counter jungler J4.) [In other words, this is roughly 99% sarcastic.]
STEP 1: Pick a strong duo lane consisting of characters who don't suck complete *** early game (any combo of melee/bruisers/CC bots). It doesn't matter which character you decide to "support" as. Do you want to play something like Darius and Pantheon or Zed and Riven in a lane? Go ahead.
STEP 2: If you have an actual ranged AD carry, send them mid to mindlessly farm and push towers. If the enemy team is running 2-1-2, and the 2 duo laners are strong early game CC bot tank melee assassin bruisers, your AD carry will more than likely get dunked to the heavens and back, so mid is now a nice comfy lane for them to chill in. (Unless mid is also a duo lane.)
STEP 3: Holy ****, this is the most important part. Are you ready for this ****? Start with a Relic Shield…